The Cullens plus Amusement Park equals DISASTER!
by Twilight Fan Girls
Summary: The Cullens want to have some family fun together and settle on heading to an amusement park. The boys make bets on who thet think will hit the most rides, and the winner gets to force the others into embarrassing dares...but who will win? NEW CHAPTER UP
1. A Cullen Family Event

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Twilight, nor do I own any of the characters! But Edward OWNS MY SOUL!

This is my second attempt at a solo story because my first one didn't go so well…in fact, it was downright pathetic. So this is Harry here again, writing a new fan-fic and hoping that you all will like it. Without further ado, I present:

**The Cullens plus Amusement Park equals DISASTER!**

**Bella POV**

I had just finished another Cooking Class 101 with Charlie. Today's exciting lesson was all about the Miracle of Cereal. Turns out Charlie had poured his first bowl of cereal today and needed a little guidance. At least that way, after I was changed into a vampire, Charlie could whip up some cereal to save himself from starvation. After I had demonstrated how to use a spoon to actually EAT the cereal, and Charlie insisted that he knew what he was doing, I wandered off to my room. As I shut the door behind me, I perched myself onto my bed. I gazed around the room, looking for something to do, and my eyes fell upon a picture. I walked over to the picture and picked it up, dropping it the second I realized what it was.

This was no ordinary picture. This was the picture given to me by Alice, and it was from the last sleepover we had had. In the picture stood me, Rosalie and Alice along with…Aro. We all had our arms around each other and we were all wearing scandalously skimpy lingerie. ME? Pose SO OPENLY in a picture wearing LINGERIE? I didn't remember that. I don't even think I would EVER do that! That wasn't the worst part though. I unwillingly looked at Aro and my eyes **BURNED. **Aro had his arm around my waist and was wearing a horribly tight, fire red Speedo. I gagged and cringed and made a mental note to burn that picture at the first chance I got, as well as ask Alice why I didn't remember any of this…

I looked up from the picture and found myself staring at Edward. I shoved the picture under my bed as he crossed the room and pulled me into his arms. "Alice saw that you were bored. So I'm taking you over to my place!" Edward said brightly.

"Hmm…well I have nothing better to do. Charlie's fed, the dishes are clean and the laundry's done. I guess I'll meet you downstairs then," I said to Edward as he kissed me goodbye and flew out my window. I changed into more appropriate clothing so I didn't look like a complete hobo-slob and walked back downstairs. As I reached the bottom of the stairs I shouted, "I'm going over to Edward's place, Dad. Is that alright?"

Charlie looked grumpy. "Alice will be there right? Well, I guess you can go. DON'T be out too late. I'll be at Billy's," he muttered.

"Sure thing, Dad." I found Edward waiting outside with his Volvo, wearing a huge grin. "Why are you so happy?!" I asked him.

"Carlisle has some great plans for what we can do today. We're having a little family event!" Edward replied, holding the door open for me. I gulped. I hated events. Events of any sort. I sat quietly as Edward drove us to his house too fast, as usual.

When he held open the front door for me, Emmett obscured my field of view with his abnormally large self. "Hi Bella! Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi! It took you long enough…hi Bella!" Emmett was obviously excited about something, but I was afraid to know what.

Alice danced over to me. "Guess what? It's not as great as shopping, but it's going to be a first for all of us." Alice took a deep breath and said, "So you're going to be changed soon, right? Well, Carlisle and Esme thought that we should all have a little "human experience" together before you die! Wanna know what it is?"

"No," I said, my eyes wide with fear. All of the Cullens looked at me with smiles on their perfect faces until…

"WE'RE GOING TO ADVENTURE LAND!!!!" Emmett bellowed out. I didn't get it. What the hell is Adventure Land? Rosalie answered my unanswered question as she came into view.

"Hey, Bella. Adventure Land is an amusement park. We thought we would all head over there to relax and have some fun." The blood drained out of my face. I _hated_ amusement parks with a passion. I was scared of heights and fast moving things.

"You know, we could all just stay here and do something. You didn't have to go to all this trouble…" My voice trailed off as Esme gave me a stern look.

"Now Bella, this is no trouble at all. We all want to go as well!" Esme said. Alice grabbed my hand and pulled me back outside.

"Jasper's waiting for us in Emmett's Jeep. We'll be riding with him and Edward. This is going to be so much fun!" Alice babbled. I let myself get pulled towards hell (again). After the unbearably long car-ride to "Adventure Land", we all stepped out of the Jeep.

I looked up and felt my heart stop. Rides that extended high into the air towered over everything, and I heard an intake of breath at my side. I looked over to see Edward looking –if possible- even paler than usual.

**Edward POV**

Jasper, Emmett and I had all made bets about who was going to go on the most rides. We had bragged about ourselves and decided the two who went on the least rides would have to succumb to a dare that the winner chose for them. Emmett was stupid enough to think what his dares would be if he won. I found out he would make one of us act gangster while the other would have to be emo, all day. I shuddered at the thought.

As I gazed up at the towering rides above us, I felt a small pang of fear. A couple seconds later, I was hit by wave after wave of panic and horror that was NOT coming from me. I looked around to see Jasper's knees buckling as he collapsed to the ground. WIMP!

Alice ran over to Jasper to support him and scowled. "Oh come on Jasper, you said you wouldn't do this! You said you could control your ability! You _said_ you weren't afraid of anything!" Of course.

Jasper was sending fearful emotions towards all of us. I smirked. I knew who was going to lose the bet the quickest…

Carlisle, Esme, Rosalie and Esme had arrived while Jasper was trying to recover from his little collapsing incident. Emmett sniggered and walked over to me. He pulled on a football helmet and turned towards the park.

"Let's do this."


	2. Bets

Hello, all, it's Harry here again. This chapter should begin to pick things up a bit so I'm hoping you'll all like it. Reviews are appreciated. Thanks!

**Bets**

**Bella POV**

Alice had helped Jasper into his feet and he had calmed his nerves a bit. Emmett was standing next to Edward, looking ridiculous as he stood there with a football helmet on his head. Carlisle walked over to us, rubbing his hands together. "Let's get our tickets, shall we?" We walked towards the concession stand. Alice leaned over towards Edward and said,

"Hey, I want in on this bet of yours, too."

"Alright, who are you betting for? Odds are pointing to me and Emmett already, seeing how Mr. Panic Attack here might not be able to handle it," Edward replied, grinning down at me. Alice snorted.

"Oh please, I don't want to place any money on _you fools._ I want to compete, too!" Emmett, Edward and Jasper froze in their tracks and began howling with laughter. Emmett managed to control himself and gasped out,

"You'd be lucky if they let you go on half the rides, short stuff." Alice scowled and walked on in silence, her scowl growing as the ticket vendor came into view. Together, we mobbed the small and innocent looking girl behind the counter, who was sitting and reading out of boredom. As she watched us approach, her eyes flickered to Jasper and she put her book down with a scowl that matched Alice's.

"Welcome to Adventure Land. What do you want?" The girl asked in a monotone voice, heavy with annoyance. My eyes fell onto her name tag, which read "Courtney".

"Good morning. I'd like to get 8 adult full day passes, please," Carlisle asked gently. The girl punched in some numbers onto her computer screen and barked out,

"$431.00. PAY UP DAMNIT." Carlisle pulled out his wallet, looking slightly offended. Courtney began to pull out thin, purple wristbands and handed them out to us. When Alice reached out for hers, she jerked her wristband away. "Aren't you a little too young to be using an adult pass? Well, even if so, you're way too short to actually get one. Here," Courtney pulled out a green wristband. "You can have this one. It's for little kids who need a RESPONSIBLE ADULT to go on the big rides! Is your big brother going to help you put that on?" Courtney licked her lips as she looked at Jasper and winked.

Jasper looked frightened and shifted away slowly. Alice's eyes were burning with hatred. "Actually, that's my _husband._" Courtney's eyes bulged with shock. She pulled out the remaining wristband that was meant for Jasper and scrawled something on it. Jasper took it looking nervous, and began fastening it on. I leaned over towards Jasper's wrist and saw a phone number scrawled onto it in messy handwriting. I giggled.

"Alright, everyone. Esme and I will be together. The rest of you…do whatever you want. Let's all meet back here at 10 PM. Oh and please control yourselves in front of all the humans," Carlisle said, raising his eyebrows at his perfect, innocent looking "children's" faces. Carlisle and Esme walked off, hand in hand. Emmett pumped his fist into the air.

"What first? WHAT FIRST?" He yelled, quivering with excitement. I looked over my shoulder and saw a towering, giant, rainbow-coloured pole. That seemed like a good place to start off.

"Why don't we go on that first? It's called Drop Zone…" I can't believe I just suggested that. I HATE heights. Alice, Rosalie, Edward, Emmett and Jasper looked up at the giant pole.

"YEAH!" Emmett screamed, running into the line and knocking over a small, fragile looking little boy in his haste. Everyone else remained where they were, swooning and looking ready to faint. Rosalie looked angry.

"Jasper, STOP IT! If you don't want to go on the stinking ride then DON'T!" She roared at him. I exchanged an exasperated look with Alice.

**Jasper POV**

I couldn't help it! Looking up at the giant ride which towered hundreds of feet over us was _so _intimidating. I guess I know how Alice feels now when she's standing in between me and Emmett.

"I'm…I'm sorry! I…I…I want to go on … the… the ride," I managed to stutter out. The others began to hurry away from me to get away from my waves of panic that were being spread to them.

"Hey, Bella, why don't you join the competition, too?" Alice asked Bella, winking at her. "Come on, we can take these guys on _any_ day." Bella shrugged.

"Sure, why not?" Edward turned to Bella with a worried look on his face.

"Bella…are you sure you want to do this? You could get hurt," Edward said to her softly, seizing her waist and pulling her closer.

"Please Edward, don't baby me," Bella replied, grinning at Alice. "What about you, Rosalie?" Rosalie scowled back at her.

"I don't want to take part in any of this mess," she said grumpily. As we approached the front of the line, I took a look at who our ride operator would be. I froze. It was Courtney.

**Alice POV**

I saw Jasper go even paler than he was before entering the line-up for Drop Zone. I followed his gaze towards the ride operator. Oh GREAT. It was that annoying, angsty girl that liked to assume that I was a little girl AND she was trying to steal MY MAN. I rolled my eyes toward her and moved up a couple of spaces. Finally, it was our turn to board the ride. There was enough room for 8 passengers around the ride, and the seats were organized in pairs.

Bella sat down beside Edward, Rosalie beside Emmett and Jasper beside me. Two other people took the remaining seats and looked towards the guys with intimidated looks on their faces. The ride was so high off the ground that almost everyone's feet hung off the floor (NOT only mine). Everyone's but Jasper's of course. The annoying ride attendant walked around the large pole, making sure everyone was securely harnessed to their seats and there was no danger of them falling out at the very top. As Courtney came around to check mine and Jasper's harnesses, she smirked at me.

"With a responsible adult are we?" She said as she checked my seatbelt. She made her way towards Jasper and made quite the little scene of checking his safety. She leaned over him and double –no, triple- checked his harnessing. "All safe," she said suggestively as she smiled at him and walked back to start the ride. Jasper's panic began to mount again and was already starting to hit a new high. I began to scream, though the ride wasn't even off the ground yet.

Along with my screams, Jasper began to yell as well. People looked over at us curiously, thinking we were stupid enough to start screaming already out of fear. Well, Jasper was, anyways.

"Keep your filthy, groping hands and feet to yourselves at all times. Do not stand, not that you could if you tried. Enjoy the ride and hope you don't die," Courtney said evilly. The ride jerked upwards and Jasper and I continued to scream, our yells becoming louder and louder.

**Bella POV**

The ride was picking up speed as it shot straight upwards. Alice and Jasper were already horrified and were screaming their lungs off. As the ride went higher, I heard a new high-pitched scream of terror and whipped around as the wind began to get colder the higher up we went. I tried to turn myself as best as I could in my too-tight harness and looked over at Rosalie, who I assumed had screamed. Instead, I saw Emmett screaming more high pitched than I could've ever imagined. I felt shocked as Edward soon began screaming in my ear, deafening me. Soon, everyone on the ride was shrieking as though they were about to be slaughtered, and realized it was all because of Jasper.

I squeezed my eyes shut as we reached the very top, ready to be dropped from the huge height. I was about to go deaf from all the noise surrounding me when I suddenly heard a loud _CRUNCH._ I whipped my head around again, this time to Jasper's chair and saw that he was clinging to his harness so hard that it had completely broken off. He was now supported by absolutely nothing now, sitting rigidly in his chair hundreds of feet off the ground.

Oh crap.


	3. Jasper's Stalker

It's Harry time again! So I'm glad that people actually liked my fan fiction…and I'm striving to make them even better. Thanks for the reviews and enjoy!

**Jasper's Stalker**

**Rosalie POV**

Jasper was slipping out of his seat, his harness had broken and now he was clinging onto the sides of the chair, his eyes wide with fear. He seemed paralyzed as he looked down (the idiot, doesn't he know you're _never_ supposed to look down?) and made no effort to try to re-seat himself. I tried to overcome my own fear and the cast amounts of terror coming from Jasper. I took long, steady breaths of air (not that I needed to) and screamed out, "JASPER CALM DOWN! YOU CAN'T DIE, FOOL!" He could be squashed, but I didn't want to imagine that. But of course, he couldn't here me over the huge amounts of noise that surrounded us. I waited for the ride to drop, and then suddenly, the ride jerked downwards.

**Alice POV**

We were falling, falling at very fast speeds and Jasper went flying out of his chair. He shut his eyes and screamed like he'd never screamed before. His fear had filled me and left my brain temporarily blank. I pushed away the emotions and reached to grab Jasper from the air. He stopped screaming (along with everyone else) as my arm grabbed his shirt sleeve and looked up at me in extreme shock. We were continuing to plummet, and I thanked Carlisle for my super strength. _Good thing Jasper wore his shirt that was double-seamed! _

The ride FINALLY slowed down and it was eerily quiet now that Jasper had controlled his out-of-control emotions. As the ride came to a stop, I shoved Jasper back into his chair…it might look odd if the humans had seen a 4 feet 10 inch girl holding a muscley male over 6 feet tall in the air. We pulled our harnesses off and bolted before anyone could see the broken one. Jasper sat down on the closest bench and we all crowded around him. I sat down in his lap, cuddling with him. What I would've done if he had been flattened…

Rosalie looked around at all the faces in the group. "Well," she said. "That was dramatic."

Bella had turned extremely red and muttered, "That was all my fault." We all looked around at her in surprise. "I'm the one that suggested we go on that." Edward scowled at her.

"Don't beat yourself up Bella. You didn't know how bad Jasper would take the ride…none of us did. Guess we all know," Edward now turned to scowl at Jasper. "Why don't you take Jasper home, Alice?"

Surprisingly, Emmett sniggered. "Wimp," he said quietly.

Jasper stood up, sending me flying. "I'm STAYING. Just because I have weak nerves, does _not_ mean I'm a wimp. Besides, I'd never lose a bet to girls like you," Jasper snarled at Emmett and Edward.

"Look, I already know who's going to win, okay? I'll just tell you before someone actually does get hurt," I said.

"NO!" They all screamed out. Emmett grinned.

"What are we going to go on, next?" He asked enthusiastically. "Let the wimp decide." Jasper looked around and his eyes lit up.

"That one! THAT ONE!" He shouted with excitement. We all looked around.

Oh you've got to be kidding me. It was the merry-go-round.

**Bella POV**

I still felt totally guilty about the whole Jasper-almost-falling-from-hundreds-of-feet-in-the-air thing but he seemed cool about it. He probably thought of me even worse than before. But now he was back to his normal self, a little more excited than usual. We all ran towards the merry-go-round that Jasper was soooo pumped about. As we piled into the long line, I looked around. We were surrounded by little kids that were on little kid-crack. There were random screams coming from them as they jumped up and down and climbed over everything. I almost had a heart attack and had the urge to punch one of them.

The line started to move forward as everyone ran to get their own horse or a little carriage for themselves. We neared the front and a familiar voice called out, "Hey, hot stuff!" What the flip? How the hell did Courtney become the person controlling the ride for this ride, too? I turned to Edward and muttered,

"You know, that girl kind of creeps me out. It's like she's stalking Jasper or something." Edward turned to frown at Courtney.

"I should have a little chat with her," he said, looking concerned. It was our turn to go on again, and we all pushed past Courtney, Alice slamming into her "accidentally" and knocking her onto the floor. Jasper paused on his way to the carousel and held out his hand to her, hesitantly. Courtney seized his hand and pulled herself up WAY too close to him. She was up against his chest. Jasper immediately stepped back and turned to hurry away as she called out,

"Thanks sexy!"

I rolled my eyes and walked past her. Edward was holding my hand and had abruptly stopped in front of Courtney. He pulled me back towards him. "Do you mind if I talk to you for a bit?" He said to her, pulled me closer to him. Courtney eyed Edward carefully then nodded.

"Yeah, what do you want?" She said aggressively. She pulled at her shirt collar suggestively and I raised my eyebrows at her.

"Well, I'd appreciate it if you _didn't_ hit on my brother. He's already taken, you see," Edward said politely, his eyes smoldering. I knew he was trying to dazzle her so she would stay away. The girl snorted.

"Oh please. Since when has anyone being _taken_ stopped me?" She grinned smugly and motioned for us to keep the line moving. Edward lifted me and settled me onto a horse high above the ground and then got onto his with amazing agility and grace. Alice and Rosalie had sat down in a little carriage and Emmett and Jasper were on their own horses. The ride started to move.

"YEAH!" Jasper screamed out. I had never seen him act so immature before. I wondered if he felt okay. The ride picked up speed and we went around and around, faster each time. "THIS IS AWESOME!" Jasper called out. "WOOOOOH!" I saw the rest of the beautiful Cullen's with huge grins on their faces out of amusement and from the excitement waves coming from Jasper. Each time Jasper came into view of Courtney, she would wink at him. Jasper didn't notice as he yelled out stupid comments. All the kids surrounding us looked frightened.

Once the ride stopped, Jasper pouting, looking adorable. "Does going on one ride more than once count for the competition?" He asked Emmett and Edward. The latter shook his head.

"It's not much of a competition if you keep going on the same little kids' ride over and over again. Grow up, little brother. We're going on the _real_ rides now." We got off the ride and a thought occurred to me.

"Hey, are we allowed to team up and compete?" I asked out. Edward considered that idea. Emmett grinned again and said,

"That would be kind of cool. You're saying we form little team up and the team that goes on the most rides wins?" He questioned. "I say we make it a battle of the sexes. Guys against girls. We can handle Jasper," Emmett grimaced. "Unless you want him on your team. We'll trade you for Alice."

"No way!" Alice shouted back.

"Alright, alright. A battle of the sexes it is then. Whichever team wins gets the other team at their mercy," Edward said, smiling. Rosalie looked around.

"Let's go on that ride next!" She said, as she pointed to a huge rollercoaster that looped and twisted every way possible. Alice and I grinned. Jasper wouldn't like that, now would he?

"You're on!" Emmett said as we all ran towards the line, laughing. Jasper stood back, his eyebrows pulling together as he stared at the ride, mesmerized.

We had this competition in the bag.


	4. Unwise Decisions

Harry's back! Wooh, sorry it took so long to post up another chapter but here you areee! Hope you like it!

_**Un**_**wise Decisions**

**Edward POV**

Jasper joined us in the line-up for "The Bat". Considering the small bet that had started between brothers had turned into a huge competition of girls against guys, I wasn't so thrilled when I saw his face. Jasper looked as if he could faint and was slightly trembling. WHY WAS HE TREMBLING? I sighed and Bella looked up at me.

"Regretting accepting my little challenge, are we?" She asked, smiling while looking at Jasper as she wrapped herself closer to me.

"No way! If you do win, it's because we were going easy on you," I answered, kissing her lightly on the forehead. Bella pulled away.

"Edward, I_ told_ you not to baby me! You've got to play fair in this. And that means full throttle if you have to." Bella grinned and came closer again. The line slowly moved up and I could hear everyone's pointless rambling in their heads. _Oooh, look at that group of hunks over there._ I heard some average girls thoughts. As if that was new. _What I wouldn't give to have one of them by my side…at night…alone…in my room…where we could-_ I pulled my thoughts away from her. Ugh. Bella trying to seduce me was enough.

It took us an hour to get near the front of the line. By then, Emmett was supporting Jasper with a disgusted look on his face. Finally, it was our turn to board the ride. It was a large roller coaster with 4 giant loops and was made out of heavy-looking metal. Suddenly, I heard a sharp and concerned-sounding voice. "What's wrong with him?" I looked up. Surprise, surprise! It was Courtney! She walked forwards and grabbed Jasper's hand, saying, "Sweetie? Are you okay? Do you need some water?" Emmett shoved past her, pulling Jasper with him and gruffly replied,

"He needs nothing, stop bothering him, skank!" He tossed Jasper into the front seat of a roller coaster cart and sat down beside him. Bella and I sat down behind them, and Alice and Rosalie behind us. I saw a smirk on Rosalie's face as we put on our seatbelts. I turned around and asked, 

"What are _you _so smug about?"

Rosalie scoffed. "Oh please, Edward, sometimes I wonder how you completed medical school twice. Why on earth would you put Jasper in the FRONT seat? You're just begging to make him freak out even more." And sure enough, fresh waves of terror smashed into all of us. I found my knees quaking and Bella sniggering at me.

**Bella POV**

Wow, boys can be so dumb sometimes. Edward's face told me he knew that this was going to be disastrous and I could see all of the Cullen's shaking with the fear radiating from Jasper. The ride began to move forward and was now leaving the platform. A loud whimper escaped from Jasper's lips. The ride moved forward slowly, picking up speed. It would occasionally take a sudden dip causing the Cullen's to roar in fright. When the ride became faster, the sound of the Cullen's screams was deafening, once again. I looked over the edge of the roller coaster cart and found curious people peering up at all the source of the noise. I spotted Courtney watching us with an amused smile on her face. The cart was approaching one of the loops now. I braced myself for the impact and for the noise. We were thrown forward into a spiral and I suddenly found myself going upside down. Alice was stomping her feet and screaming her little insides off while Jasper was heavily dry sobbing. I actually began to laugh at the expressions of fear on their faces.

I saw Emmett's face looking like a little kids as it was scrunched up in fright. Rosalie's eyes were bulging out of her eye-sockets. Edward looked stoned. I screamed with laughter and they all looked over at me, as if I was some kind of alien. "COME ON, YOU GUYS, BUCK UP! This is loads of fun, Jasper, stop having a spazz attack!" I hollered over the winds. But Jasper had slid down in his seat and looked like he was about to have a seizure. The roller coaster zoomed towards the second loop. The screaming got worse. I put my hands over my ears from all the yelling around me. We turned upside down over another one of the loops. This continued until we got to the fourth one. As we were going up and over for the fourth and final time, something happened that nearly made my heart stop. Now _I_ joined in on the screaming as panic began to fill my insides as well.

The ride had stopped. Upside down. At the very top of the loop.

**Emmett POV**

We were dangling from our chairs while we were upside down mid-loop of the roller coaster. What was going on? All I could feel and sense around me was fear and anguish. I was screaming like there would be no tomorrow, and that might have been true. What were the chances that the ride had broken down right when we were upside down?

I sobbed uncontrollably and then I heard someone screaming words at me. I didn't seem to process them very well, though. "EMMETT! EMMETT, YOU'RE HOLDING ONTO THE ROLLER COASTER! EMMETT, LET GO!" I didn't get it. What did they mean? Nothing was clear in my head, and it was all that stupid Jasper's fault.

**Alice POV**

I could see the blood rushing to Bella's head. Her face was going a dark red colour. We needed to get the roller coaster moving soon again otherwise Bella was going to explode. And we didn't want that, now did we? Emmett was leaning out of the side of his seat and clinging desperately to the metal roller coaster, stopping us from going anywhere. "Emmett!" I called desperately, the fear becoming overwhelming as I started to sob a little, too. "Emmett, please let go!"

"STAY CALM! HELP IS ON THE WAY!" I looked down to see Courtney standing there with a megaphone in her hand as she looked panickedly towards Jasper. _Stupid whore_, I thought over the fear. Ugh, this couldn't go on for much longer. 

"ROSALIE, EDWARD, GRAB EMMETT! WE'VE GOT TO MAKE HIM LET GO!" I shouted to the other two. Together we all lunged towards Emmett (as best as we could considering we were upside down) and tried to pry his hands from the metal. He wouldn't budge. I heard a sudden scream and saw that Bella's seatbelt was done up very loosely, and Bella was close to slipping out of her upside down seat and falling…straight onto the hard metal underneath us. Before any of us could grab Bella's hand, she slipped right out of her seat. Edward roared and desperately tried seizing her hand, but Bella's was coated in sweat and she went flying out of his grip and towards the metal, screaming her lungs off.

Was this the end of Bella?


	5. Mysteries

Hey guys, I really appreciate all the reviews and I'm thrilled at the response to the last chapter. So here is the next chapter in my little fan-fic that will answer all your questions…or will it?

**Mysteries**

**Rosalie POV**

"BELLA! BELLA!"

I watched helplessly along with all the other humans waiting below us as Bella plunged to the ground, screaming and flailing as she fell. Her seatbelt had loosened and sent her plummeting towards the cold, hard metal towards her (what seemed certain) death. Edward roared "BELLA! BELLA!" and began to undo his own seatbelt to dive after her. Though we were still upside down I grabbed hold of his arm which he yanked away with immense strength.

"EDWARD, WHAT GOOD WILL IT DO?! You won't be able to save her by falling after her! STOP, EDWARD!" But Edward was struggling fruitlessly against my attempts at restraining him. It took all my effort and strength to hold him down and stop him from being a fool and jumping after Bella. She was gone, and there was nothing any of us could do about it. Snarls were ripping from Edward's chest as he dry sobbed and gazed down in complete and utter horror. Incomprehensible words were pouring from Edward's mouth as he struggled to free himself from me.

"SHE….DIE….CAN'T…MY FAULT…NOT AGAIN!" Edward managed to roar out and lashed out at me. He scraped his short fingernails against my granite skin and to my immense shock, he left deep gouges in my skin. He began punching at every inch of me he could possibly reach, leaving dark marks on my skin. I pulled away, shocked by this. Alice was still struggling to pull Emmett's hands off the roller coaster, the reason we were stuck in this absurd upside down position. I tried to help Alice with Emmett as Edward's anger turned to anguish and he no longer attempted to fall from his chair after Bella. Finally, we managed to release Emmett's mammoth-strong grip so that the roller coaster moved again and we were moving at last. When we pulled back to the platform what seemed like ages later, we all sprinted out of our seats and to the spot where Bella had fell.

How could this be? There was no sign of a body at the place where Bella should have fallen, no sign of any blood and no sign of Bella's crushed limps against the cold metal.

**Edward POV**

I had finally lost control of myself. I stared in complete and utter horror at where Bella should have lain, though there was nothing there but the deathly roller coaster. Where was Bella? Could they have moved her and cleaned up the area so quickly? I dropped to my knees and let out a cry of misery. I couldn't live without her. I _wouldn't_ live without her. I had to go to the Volturi. My life was nothing without Bella. I could feel Alice's cold hands around my shoulder, willing me to stand up. Her voice shook as she tried to pull me up but I wouldn't budge. Suddenly I heard a voice behind me.

"Edward, get up. I'm fine."

**Meanwhile…**

Carlisle and Esme sat inside a small children's ride. It was a little helicopter that moved slower than a snail. They sat with their arms around each other, enjoying the scenery. "This is nice!" Carlisle said, looking around. "I wonder what the kids are up to."

**Alice POV**

I heard Bella's voice and I whipped around. There she stood, wrapped in blankets and looking flustered. There beside her stood Courtney, looking grumpy. I looked around at the others to make sure I wasn't imagining it, and they all wore the same look of shock that was on my face. Oh…I guess I wasn't imaging it! Edward was beside Bella in a heartbeat (haha…oh, you know) and had his arms wrapped around her. He looked horrified and deeply grateful. I walked over to Bella and hugged her tight. "How? How is this possible?" I asked her, looking from her to Courtney, and back again.

"She saved me. I don't know how but…Courtney saved me!" Bella said, her eyes shining with tears. We all turned our shocked faces towards Courtney now, who shrugged and walked away. Edward guided Bella towards a bench and we all followed.

"Tell us what happened! It's almost impossible that you didn't die!" I said, taking a seat beside Bella.

Bella looked around at us all. "Well…I was certain that I was about to die as soon as I fell from the chair too…and as I was falling I kept on picking up speed. But then when I was a few feet from the ground, I completely slowed down. I mean, my feet actually touched the floor when I landed. I kind of just…floated down and touched the floor lightly. No fall or anything." What on earth? Had Bella lost it?

"But," I started, thoroughly confused. "How is that possible? I think we should take you home, Bella." Bella looked angry.

"I'm not making it up Alice. I'm as confused as you are. Maybe I have a guardian angel out there somewhere," Bella joked. Edward looked angry.

"That's it, Bella. We're leaving. We've got to find Carlisle and Esme and get out of here. I should've known better than to bring you here, what with your luck and all," Edward murmured to himself. Bella looked up at Edward. 

"Edward, I know you're worried about me and all, but I really don't want to go. That was an accident, and I don't want to ruin a completely harmless vacation," Bella said calmly to Edward, snuggling into his chest. "The bet is still on you know." Bella smiled at us all. Wow. I never knew Bella could be so brave. Edward suddenly turned towards Jasper, looking infuriated.

"AND YOU!" He bellowed at Jasper, who cowered from shock. "CONTROL YOUR [censored EMOTIONS OTHERWISE YOU'RE GOING TO REGRET IT YOU [censored [censored!" Edward screamed at Jasper. (**It's Harry here guys, and I have a little comment. I don't like swearing, so I censored it. But come on, wouldn't you swear at Jasper too if someone you loved nearly died because of him?)**

Jasper looked taken aback. I walked over to him and sat down beside him on the ground. "Please, sweetie, control your emotions. And try not to kill anyone else, okay?" I muttered, kissing him lightly. "So, what next?"

"I say another roller coaster," Emmett said, grinning evilly. "We'll all sit AWAY from Jasper though. That way, we'll all be safe." It sounded like a smart enough idea. "Besides, I still want to win this bet!" So we all scampered off towards another roller coaster. It was huge and called "Top Gun." This should be fun!

**Bella POV**

So after we were all sure I was alright, we hurried off towards Top Gun. It was a standing-up roller coaster and I'd be okay on this one as long as Jasper wasn't around. He already looked terrified. As we neared the ride, we spotted a large board. "All guests 6 feet 2 inches and taller will not be able to go on this ride due to safety hazard. Sorry for the inconvenience. HA!" I read, looking up at the guys. "Guess you can't go on this one!" Alice, Rosalie an I giggled and ran off towards the line, leaving Emmett and Edward looking disgruntled and Jasper looking relieved. We were totally going to win the bet! We saw that Courtney was operating this ride too.

What is up with that girl?


	6. Stupid Emmet, LOOK WHAT YOU DID!

Hallllo, young Poppits! I'm sorry I haven't updated in a couple of days but I've been busy trying to save the wizarding world. You can forgive me, right? Here's another chapter…

**Stupid Emmett, look what you've done!**

**Rosalie POV**

Once we got off Top Gun, which was actually loads of fun when Jasper wasn't there to completely screw up everyone's emotions, Alice, Bella and I ran back to where the guys were standing. Before we got there, Alice stopped us and quietly whispered, "You know, I don't get why they're waiting for us when they could be going on another ride. I mean, they're SOO desperate to win this bet and everything yet they're too dumb to go on the rides without us." Hmm…Alice had a good point there. Oh well, it's not like we were going to remind them that we weren't attached at the hip. It was there loss and our win. If we could keep this lead, then we would totally win this bet in a second.

We happily skipped back to our men as they sulked. Just then, Bella's face lit up and she pulled herself away from Edward. "Rosalie, Alice, could I talk to you guys? Alone?" She said, glaring at Emmett as he tried to listen in as well. We followed Bella away from the guys. "I have a little plan that would guarantee our defeat," Bella said, grinning evilly. "Why don't we just find all the rides that tall people aren't allowed on and go on all of those instead?" Hah! That was genius.

"Excellent plan, my … soon-to-be sister!" I said in agreement.

"Niiiiice," Alice echoed. We returned to Edward, Emmett and Jasper again, putting on our most angelic faces. Emmett wasn't convinced by them.

"What are you three up to?" He said, his eyes narrowing.

"Nothing!" Bella said, a little too suddenly. "Come on, I see some other great rides we can go on." We all followed Bella and she discovered a ride called Vortex and one called Thunder Run. To our great pleasure, both of those were too dangerous for the guys to go on. Once Emmett found out that there was a third ride he couldn't go on in a row, he had a _huge_ fit. His face was contoured with rage and his hand shot out reflexively at an unfortunate passer-by. Even more unfortunate, this passer-by was a 7 year old kid. The kid started to bawl.

"MOMMMMMMMMMMMY!!" The little boy shrieked, his face dented and bleeding. Emmett looked horrified and we all ran as fast as we could away from the scene before anyone could sue Emmett. As we got far enough away, Emmett suddenly stopped us.

"WAIT A MINUTE!" He screamed out, pointing accusingly at me, Bella and Alice. "I KNOW YOUR PLAN!" Alice looked horrified and she covered her mouth in surprise. Oh great. She must have gotten distracted by that stupid, crying little kid and let Edward slip into her mind. Now he knew what we were trying to do! "They're trying to find rides that we can't go on because we're too tall! They think we won't go on anything without them!" Edward yelled out to Jasper and Emmett. Uh-oh. Emmett's face was getting angry again. Us girls all ran towards the first line we could to take cover.

**Emmett POV**

I can't believe those girls! They think we won't do anything without them?! WELL THEY WERE WRONG! I was getting angry and I was about to do something rash again. I saw a seagull wandering around looking for food near us. I seized it using my awesome agility and threw it hard, aiming towards where the girls were standing in a line for another ride.

_SMACK! _Oh shit. How was I going to get out of THIS one?

**Bella POV**

There was a huge thudding noise near me as something white and fluffy hit the side of Rosalie's head. I shrieked out of surprise and terror and saw a fat seagull flapping its wings in Rosalie's long blonde hair. It got tangled up as Alice tried to beat it away, looking disgusted. The line around us began to back away and try to get away from the seagull and the hot blonde girl causing commotion. Eventually, we managed to throw the bird back into the sky and stop all the fuss. I took a look at Rosalie and burst out laughing. Her hair was all over the place and her face looked livid and disgruntled. "EMMETT!!" Rosalie shrieked at the top of her lungs. But by then, the boys had long since bolted.

Rosalie ran out of the line, too quickly for human speed but not quite at vampire speed. Alice had frozen and had a lost look on her face. The vision face. She was seeing something in the near future. "ROSE! ROSE, I know where Emmett is!" Alice screamed, grabbing my hand and running after Rosalie. Ha ha, vampire revenge. This was going to be good.

We caught up to Rosalie and the guys in line for a small ride with a huge line. Emmett, Edward and Jasper were far ahead and it would look bad trying to cut the line. I guess Rosalie would have to save her revenge for later. I looked over to what the actual ride was. It was a large platform with a bunch of oversized teacups placed on it at random intervals. There were a lot of them, so there was a high chance that we would board when the guys would board. I turned to Rosalie. "Hey, Rose…why don't you just get back at Emmett when we win the bet? You can make him do anything you want then…" Rosalie smiled at me, an evil look in her eyes.

"Emmett's going to wish he never messed with Rosalie Lillian Hale."

**Jasper POV**

Finally. A ride I could handle. All this one did was spin pathetically around and around. I let out a sigh of relief and turned to face Emmett. "You know, Emmett, Rosalie's going to kill you." Emmett looked terrified.

"I know. We better win this bet, dudes, otherwise I'm screwed." Edward shook his head.

"You think we're going to lose to a bunch of girls? Think again, brothers. I think we should have a team name to channel some more spirit!" He said, grinning. We all thought for a minute.

"How about the Seagull Smashers?" Emmett said grinning. What the hell? That was pathetic.

"She-Vampire Crushers?"

"Dracula's Henchmen?"

"Sexy Male Terminators?" We suddenly heard a female voice that was all-too familiar. I snapped my head up and saw that we were near the front of the line where the ride operator stood. Ugh, it was Courtney _again._ There's definitely something weird about her. "I think that's a good name," she said, smirking and licking her lips while looking at me.

"Thanks, but no thanks," I heard another female voice. I looked down around my waist. Oh look. It was Alice who had said that. She had cut the line along with Bella and…Rosalie. Emmett's eyes bulged and he tried to move as far away as possible from Rosalie. She grabbed his hand before he could move and he let out a squeal of terror.

"Don't worry, sweetie, I'm over it," Rosalie said, giving Emmett a seductive smile and kissing him. Emmett believed her. I knew better. Rosalie give up so soon? Over my dead body. We all stood in line and looked over at Courtney. Rosalie frowned.

"You know, I have a little theory about that girl. I don't think she's human." She said, staring Courtney down. Courtney just rolled her eyes and let more people onto the ride. Edward nodded in agreement.

"I was thinking the same thing! You don't think she could be a…vampire, do you?"

Whoa. That never even occurred to me but the more I thought about it, the more likely it seemed. I caught Courtney's eyes again and she blew me a kiss. Yup. No human could ever be this annoyingly persistent.


	7. Experiments

Haha, I was on a role so I decided to put up two chapters together. The ideas are flowing in my head now! So enjoy these two chapters…

**Experiments**

**Alice POV**

"What do you mean you think she's a vampire?" Bella asked, looking shocked. "How is that possible? How could you not know about that?" Edward shrugged and looked back towards her.

"Well," I began. "She _does_ have certain vampire-like qualities. She's definitely pale, for one thing." Super pale to be exact. So pale that if you took a picture of her, all you'd see is a blinding flash of white.

"She's also pretty," Bella commented. "Though not vampire-standard pretty."

"But Bella, you know that the beauty is only magnified from what it originally was. So if she was average originally, she'd look like this now!" I said to her. My heart began to race. She CAN'T be a vampire. She could totally try to steal away Jasper then! I pulled closer to Edward, giving Courtney cut-eye.

"She doesn't have the dark bruise-like circles and her eyes are blue," Rosalie pointed out. "And we don't know if she has super strength yet, or if she has a special power."

"If being annoying and creepily stalkerish counts as a power, I think she _does _have one," Jasper said grumpily. I let out a laugh. "But that also doesn't explain how Bella survived that little falling accident. I mean, it had to be her." Bella shook her head, looking confused.

"Ugh. I don't know. How about we just ask her later or something, cause it's our turn to go on the ride," Bella said, running forward. I stopped Jasper and the rest from moving forward.

"Wait! We'll just conduct some…_experiments_ on her later to see if she's a vampire or not!" I said. Yeah, experiments like throwing ten cinderblocks on her head and seeing if she can survive that.

"Good idea, Alice." With some luck, those experiments could go horribly wrong and prove that Courtney WASN'T a vampire. Then, I wouldn't have to worry about any other whore stealing my man. I grinned to myself and ran forwards.

**Edward POV**

We had all sat down in pairs in our stupid little teacups. I was sitting beside Bella, my arm draped over her shoulder. Alice was with Jasper, and Rosalie was with Emmett. Speaking of Emmett, he better watch his back. I grimaced. Courtney's voice boomed out from the speakers placed near the rides platform. "Don't stand, unless you want to go flying towards your death, keep your seatbelts on at all time though I don't mind if you take them off and keep all klutz's buckled down at all times," she said, grinning evilly in Bella's direction. I pray she isn't a vampire. The ride began to spin slowly, picking up speed. Panic began to fill my insides, though this time it wasn't from Jasper. It was my own panic.

I forgot that I was afraid of things that spun too fast. I started to hyperventilate and felt so ashamed when my feelings got the better of me and I screamed out,

"WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!"

**Bella POV**

Did Edward seriously just scream that out? We were on a little kids ride that didn't even spin _that _fast. I covered my face in shame as rippled of laughter came from the people sitting around us. I looked over at Jasper to see that he was roaring with laughter at Edward's stupid comment. Okay. So this was just Edward being a wimp. I giggled and held onto Edward's torso as the ride picked up speed and we were being tossed around in our teacups.

Once the ride was over, we walked past Courtney who was howling with laughter. As we walked away, she mockingly called out to Edward. "Oh, you survived? I thought everyone was supposed to die!" We turned out backs to her and tried to keep our faces straight so that Edward's feelings wouldn't get hurt. I turned to everyone else and asked, 

"So what's the score for each team now, anyways?" Alice pulled out a sheet of paper.

"Well, the girls team is at … 13 right now, while the boys team is at…" She was interrupted by Emmett who yelled out,

"CULLENATORS! Our team is called the Cullenators!" I rolled my eyes.

"Great name choice Emmett. In fact, I think the girls team should be called the Cunning Cullens?" I suggested, grinning. Alice and Rosalie agreed on that name and Alice continued, 

"The boys are at 6." I laughed at the expression on the boys face. "So tell me, how does it feel to be losing to a bunch of girls?" Alice asked, wiggling her eyebrows.

"Shut it, midget," Emmett growled, snarling. He brightened as Courtney walked by. "So, how are we going to test out if Courtney's a vampire or not?" Rosalie answered.

"Simple. First we test her strength, then her resistance to blood and then try to find some sort of special ability she might have." That sounded easy enough.

"Phase 1: Toss something heavy at Courtney and see how well she can hold it up. It needs to be something discrete though, that she'll have to take as bait. Like Jasper!"

**Rosalie POV**

After the half an hour we wasted trying to convince Jasper to be thrown at a girl who would probably end up raping him, he finally managed to agree. We spotted Courtney sitting in the distance, at a small burger joint, watching us. She was eating a burger and onion rings. Suddenly, I was hesitant about the whole plan. Bella turned to us, looking worried. "If she's a vampire, shouldn't she NOT be eating?" My family looked concerned about this.

"Well," Edward said slowly. "It could be an act…" Courtney _was_ pretty cunning, it could be a trap.

"Does this mean I don't have to do this anymore?" Jasper said enthusiastically. Alice shook her head.

"Sorry, darling. You're still the bait. Now…" Alice quickly glanced around. There were no humans around except Bella of course. She scooped up Jasper and tossed him as if he was a coin. He went flying towards Courtney, bellowing as he soared through the air. Alice's aim was perfect and he collided, hard, with Courtney. Her chair splintered and broke, the legs rolling off in different directions. We ran over to where she sat. Bella was trying to contain her laughter. We found Jasper lying in Courtney's lap looking disgruntled. Courtney looked enraged.

She pulled out a gun and pointed it at Jasper. "WHAT THE HELL!! I'M GOING TO SUE YOUR STUPID BUTT FOR TRYING TO RAPE ME! I'M CALLING THE-" Courtney stopped abruptly, noticing it was Jasper. She ran her fingers through her hair and leant over Jasper. "Oh," she said, breathing onto his face. He looked disgusted and scared to death. "It's you. Well, in that case, I'm all yours, sweetie. Oh, and you didn't see anything." At that point, Alice ran towards her and yanked Jasper onto his feet scowling at her.

"GET YOUR OWN MAN, DAMNIT!"

Phase 1 was a failure.

**Emmett POV**

I was howling with laughter at Jasper's little "adventure" to Courtney's lap. Edward looked disappointed. "Well, experiment one was a failure. She doesn't seem to have super strength. Unless THAT was an act too!"

"Not everything is an act, Edward," Alice said, rolling her eyes. "Let's try the second phase now!"

Phase 2: Ability to resist blood.

We sat down on a near table in the burger joint. Bella bought something to eat while we discussed how we were going to do this. "I'm NOT going to go be the sacrificial lamb again!" Jasper blurted out.

"That's okay," Rose said. "You're not going to be. Bella is." Bella choked on her burger.

"What do I have to do?" She said, paling. We explained our plan to her. By the end of it, Bella looked nauseous because it involved blood, but she was willing to do it. An hour later, we located Courtney hovering around a ride called "The Fly" and we decided to initiate phase 2. For this one, all of us except Bella had to be far, far away from this point.

Edward embraced Bella. "Good luck, Bells," he said, swiftly kissing her cheek and sweeping away, the rest of us in his wake.

**Bella POV**

Ugh. I hate blood. I can't stand the sight of other peoples blood. So what was I going to do when I had to spill my own? My breath came in shaking gasps as I pulled a razor blade out of my pocket. Jasper had given it to me, and I didn't know or want to know why he had it. I stared at Courtney, full on in her eyes and put the blade to my wrist. I squeezed my eyes shut and pressed it deep into my wrist. My blood came out gushing everywhere, and I could smell it. I started to feel dizzy. Courtney ran over to me. It was working!

"You stupid, stupid EMO GIRL!" She shrieked at me. "Do you know how hard it is to clean up blood? I'm going to have to get the hydrogen peroxide for this one along with all the other chemicals we use for retards like you!" She paid no attention to my blood, there was no glint of red in her eyes. All she cared about was the mess my blood was making.

After she had gotten me bandaged up and had finished her raging, she pushed me out of the door of the medical area of the amusement park. "STAY OUT OF HERE!!" She screamed after me. The Cullens wee instantly by my side.

"Well? Did it work?" Rosalie asked, looking expectant. I shook my head and sighed.

"She wasn't tempted at all. She just looked disgusted."

"I guess this means she isn't a vampire then," Alice said slowly, as we all took it in. No one noticed Courtney come up behind us.

"Yeah, you're right about that. I'm NOT a vampire. I'm really a wizard."


	8. So you're a WHAT!

Hello young readers. Harry would like to apologize for not updating for THREE! days but I posted 2 chapters up in one day. That should make up for it. Anyways, now that we've REALLY discovered what Courtney is, let's see the drama that _this_ stirs up!

**Disclaimer: **Any of the new characters I have introduced DO NOT belong to me!

**So you're a WHAT?!**

**Bella POV**

"S-sorry?"

That was all I managed to stutter out. I think I was going insane. A WITCH?! But then again, I _was_ dating a vampire (which was what I was also about to become) and my best friend _was_ a werewolf. A witch was a great addition to my little fairytale life.

"But I thought all the witches had been burned at the stake centuries ago?" Edward said, looking shocked and alarmed. Courtney rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest.

"You retard, there are 2 things wrong with that little statement. First, I ain't no normal, average witch. I'm not even a WITCH! I'm a wizard. And second, we in the twenty first century, foo'. There's no more of that burning at the stake crap," Courtney said, doing an "around-the-world-and-back snap" in Edward's face. He looked even more alarmed than before. The group stood rooted to their spots, looking absolutely dumb-struck until I spoke up again.

"So I'm guessing there's no witch-vampire treaty or enmity or something?" I questioned, looking around at everyone's faces. Rosalie and Jasper shook their heads and Courtney angrily muttered,

"Wizard."

"I've never seen a witch before. Carlisle may have seen a few but he's never told us about that," Emmett said, staring at Courtney. She snorted and said,

"I'm a wizard! So you're all vampires, are you?"

"All but Bella here," Edward said, giving me an affectionate little squeeze while looking down at me, his eyes smouldering with affection. I reminded myself to inhale and exhale.

"I've got a vampire friend too. His name is Sanguini. I wonder if he knows you…" Courtney said, losing herself in her thoughts. Rosalie's eyes brightened.

"You know Sanguini?! HE'S THE BEST! We're second cousins and I haven't spoken to him in AGES! Can you bring him here, witch?" She asked excitedly.

"WIZARD!" Courtney roared. "AND NO!" Now it was Alice's turn to ask some questions.

"You keep saying you're a wizard but…I'm pretty sure wizards are MEN," she said, glaring at Courtney. She grinned mischievously.

"Yes, well I haven't quite got to that part yet," she said, smirking. Suddenly, she reached at her neck and ripped off her face, which was actually a mask. The new face that emerged was completely recognizable. I had seen it in movies and I knew who this was because I loved the books this person came from.

Standing before us, looking horribly frightening stood Lord Voldemort.

**Jasper POV**

I staggered backwards in shock as a tall bald man with red slits for eyes stood before us, right where Courtney had been. It was VOLDEMORT! I had recently read an amazing series of books called Harry Potter and knew that this was him. I let out a high pitched shriek and began to run away from where he stood. I whirled around to the others who stood there stupidly with their mouths hanging open. "FLY YOU FOOLS! IT IS HIM! IT IS HE-WHO-MUST-NOT-BE-NAMED! HE SHALL KILL YOU ALL UNLESS YOU FLEE! FLEE MY MINIONS, FLEE!!" I was becoming panicked once again because this man could instantly kill my innocent family, who still stood there. I mean, he had already killed WHO KNOWS how many people so killing my small family would be nothing.

I had to save myself. I ran, ran without looking back. When or if I would ever see my family again, I would never know. Anguish filled my insides.

Why do all the good die young? (Technically)

**Alice POV**

As we watched Jasper apparently flee for his life, I turned back to Courtney/Voldemort. I was SO confused.

"So you're a MAN?! You were hitting on Jasper but you're a MALE?!" I shouted at her/him. Well, him I guess. I knew why Jasper was running, because he had ranted about this guy from that random book series he read. Hmm…

"Well, sweetie, there are some things that J.K. Rowling had wrong, even though she was pretty accurate about most of it. I mean, I don't love or anything but LOOK AT HIM!" I knew he was referring to Jasper. "How could you NOT hit on that gorgeous hunk of granite-like vampire? He's GORGEOUS and oh-so-sexy. Don't get me wrong, I'm not gay or anything. I just think he's sooooo delectable. I could eat him up with a spoon!" Voldemort crooned. Edward rolled his eyes.

"Fine then. Prove that you're a _wizard_," Rosalie said, cocking her head to the side testily. Voldemort pulled a thin piece of what looked like wood from beneath a set of black robes he was suddenly wearing (even though his alter-ego Courtney had been wearing a band t-shirt and jeans). Then, from the wood-made stick, he produced a colourful bouquet of flowers. Rosalie squealed in amazement and reached out to take them from him, then suddenly he muttered something that made the flowers catch on fire. Rosalie screamed and dropped them while Voldemort cackled evilly.

"I hate flowers and all these stupid little rainbows-and-sunshine things," Voldemort said happily. Emmett looked angry.

"Did you just try to hurt my wife?" He said, taking a step towards Voldemort.

"Emmett, NO!" Bella screamed. "He can kill even YOU! Even though you're already dead!" Just then, Voldemort turned his what I assumed was a wand and pointed it towards Emmett. He shrieked,

"AVADA KEDAVRA!" A burst of green light shot at Emmett's chest and Emmett squealed like a little pig, and fell to the floor, cringing.

"That hurt," he said, pouting.

"So now do you believe me? That's how I saved the stupid klutz girl," Voldemort said, gesturing to Bella. "I used a hovering spell to save her. I didn't want to have to go through all that paperwork if she died. And I've been able to stalk that hunky Jasper because I can Apparate from place to place. You know, instantly vanish and then re-appear somewhere else! You vampires are so out of it, you know."

As reality finally started to sink in, there was another flash of light and suddenly, a scrawny boy appeared from thin air beside Voldemort.

"HARRY!" Voldemort squealed.

"VOLDY!!" Harry shrieked, if possibly, louder.

Great. ANOTHER ONE?!

**Harry Potter POV**

"How have you been, Voldy?" I asked my old friend. The books that we were in may have said that we were enemies, but what did books know?

"Fabulous, Harry, my boy," he replied. I noticed he was standing with a group of really, really, REALLY good looking people.

"Wow. Who are _they?"_

"These are my NEW vampire friends. Alice, Edward, Emmett, Rosalie and umm, I don't remember the last one's name," Voldemort replied, pointing towards an average looking girl that looked out of place. Blah. The average girls' eyes bulged as she saw me and Voldemort standing together.

"Aren't you two ENEMIES?!" She said in shock.

"Psh, no way. Voldy and I are BEST FRIENDS!" It was true! "Anyways Voldy, I don't have time for chit-chat. Dumbledore needs our help to find another magical artefact." I said, turning to my BFF.

"Ugh, what is it THIS time?!" Voldemort said, looking pissed off.

"The magical streetlamp of doom. Let's go, friend!" So we linked arms and skipped away, vanishing on the spot in front of the extremely confused looking vampires.

**Edward POV**

We must have stood there in silence for 10 minutes. "So…that was weird," Alice said, looking as if she had woken up from some bizarre dream."

"I didn't understand any of that!" Bella said. "How about we just act like it never happened and continue on with our day?"

"Deal," we all replied, looking relieved. So we walked off, hiding out confusion as we went to look for Jasper. I didn't know how we would find him because he was fleeing to save his life (what the hell?). As we walked by the merry-go-round, we heard a familiar voice squeal,

"WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" I looked around it to find Jasper looking delighted on a horse as the ride slowly spun around and around. Once Jasper had finally gotten off it, he spotted us and let out a squeal of glee. "YOU'RE ALIVE!"

"Jasper, you're an embarrassment to us all," Emmett muttered darkly. Well, that was for sure. Bella looked at her watch.

"You know, we still have time for a few more rides before we announce the winner of the bet…" she said, grinning. We searched the grounds for something else we could all go on.

"Look, look, BUMPER CARS! LET'S GO ON THE BUMPER CARS!"

Uh-oh. Cullen style bumper cars? This was going to be a mess.

_Okay everyone, this is Harry again. This chapter was kind of random and I wrote this up in the morning so yeah. Hopefully it's okay but I have much, much better ideas for what's going to happen after. There's going to be bumper cars and the winner's of the bet will be announced! I'll post up chapters showing the losers doing their dares if you guys want._

_And if you didn't understand this chapter because you haven't read Harry Potter, I DISOWN YOU WITH THE DISOWNING PENCIL!!! But it basically means Courtney is a male wizard and that's how she creepily stalked Jasper. LATER ALLIGATORS!_


	9. EXTREME BUMPER CARS!

Oooookay, well, that last chapter was…_interesting_ enough. So now it's back to some good old fashion NORMAL. Then again, this is the Cullens we're talking about so I take that back. Thanks for continuing to read and thanks for the reviews, they're much appreciated!

**Extreme Bumper Cars (Beep Beep)**

**Emmett POV**

Ahhh, bumper cars. A classic ride that one must ALWAYS go on when at an amusement park. This has got to be one of my favourites of ALL TIME! I was almost jumping up and down with excitement while we stood in the giant line, surrounded by little kids again. After that whole Courtney/wizard/Voldemort/scrawny guy incident, I was ready for a little normality around here. Bella leaned against the metal railing and a smile crossed her face.

"Courtney's NOT the ride attendant anymore!" She said, grinning up at us. PHEW! That was a relief. Jasper laughed shakily and hugged Alice tightly.

"YES, now I have no more creepy male pretending to be female stalker anymore," he said, looking immensely relieved. The line slowly crept forward and we stood waiting for 20 minutes. In about an hour, we would have to go back and meet Esme and Carlisle to head back home. We were trailing by 7 or so rides so me and the guys HAD to pick up the pace. After this, no more sticking with the girls! As we finally reached the front of the line, the ticket attendant took one look at me, Jasper and Edward and said, 

"Sorry, boys. You're too tall to be on this ride." I could feel my anger welling up inside me. I WASN'T ALLOWED TO GO ON MY FAVOURITE RIDE?!

**Meanwhile…**

Carlisle and Esme sat in their same little helicopter, which was moving as slowly (if not slower) than before. They both sighed happily to be sitting in such a calm, quiet atmosphere. Suddenly, Esme lifted her head from Carlisle's shoulder and said to him, "You know, dear, I'm actually kind of thirsty." Carlisle smiled a beautiful, angelic smile and turned to a small backpack he had been wearing all day.

"Don't worry, darling, I've come prepared," he said and he reached into his bag. From it, he pulled two, fluffy white bunny rabbits and handed one to Esme. She let out a little squeal of delight and Carlisle held his rabbit up.

"Cheers, honey!"

**Rosalie POV**

Oh shoot. Emmett was being denied by the new ride attendant. He wasn't allowed to go onto the bumper cars along with Jasper and Edward because of their height. If there's one thing I know about Emmett, it's that he can't stand being NOT allowed to do something. His hands had curled into fists and Bella, Alice and I watched, looking amused. Hey, this was one more ride for us then! Just then, Emmett gritted his teeth and said, "Yeah, well you know what, old man? Screw you." And he popped his fist into the man's face, knocking him out cold onto the ground. A couple of people behind us shrieked but Emmett angrily pushed past Edward and Jasper to go find his bumper car. I couldn't help but let out a little giggle.

Hey, the guy was asking for it! Emmett looked considerably happier now as he chose a red bumper car. He squished himself into it, his legs sticking up bizarrely. Jasper sat down in a green bumper car, while Edward chose a royal blue one (surprise, surprise). There was one lone pink bumper car which she sprinted to. A little girl had been walking towards that one but saw Alice sitting in it and began to cry. Alice grinned at her defeat of the little girl. Bella had a yellow bumper car and I chose a red one to match Emmett's.

The cars would be able to move with static electricity, I noticed, when I looked up at the ceiling. Uh-oh…that's not good. These cars could go anywhere and everywhere.

And I MEAN everywhere.

**Bella POV**

"Please keep your hands and feet inside your cars at all times and always keep seatbelts buckled. Enjoy your ride," a weak voice muttered into the microphone stationed with the ride. It was the guy that Emmett had punched out. I grinned as the music started blasting out of speakers and everyone began to drive their cars into one another. I knew exactly who I was going to target: Edward.

As I put my foot on the pedal and began to move forward, a little boy collided with my car. I lurched backward with the force and let out a little yelp. Well, I had to be prepared for anything because this _was_ bumper cars after all. The point was to knock your car into everyone else's car. I ignored the kid and tried moving forward once again, but he crashed his car into mine AGAIN. I gave the kid a dirty look and turned the steering wheel towards the right, to get away from the kid. I had rammed into some other kid while trying to get away, and from behind me I felt a push forward. I looked back to see the annoying kid, repeatedly crashing into MY car.

"Would you cut that out?" I said to him irritably. My attempt to go after Edward wasn't going so well. I looked around at the rest of the Cullens to see them going head to head with one another. All the little kids seemed to try and avoid them. The bratty kid behind me let out a little cackle.

"NO WAY! You're a weak link and I've decided I'm going to come after you!" He said to me in a high pitched voice. Oh, so _that's_ how he wanted to play, is it?

"Well, little man, TWO CAN PLAY AT THIS GAME!" And I tried to turn my car towards him. But by now, I had become ambushed by little kids who were colliding with each other. I was trapped in the middle of their twisted little circle. The annoying brat kid grinned evilly.

"Watch out, lady."

**Alice POV**

I loved cruising along in my little pink bumper car. I was actually pretty good at this silly little game. I had collided with Jasper a couple of times, once with so much force that he went zooming across the ride area, hitting the opposite wall and sending sparks flying everywhere. Emmett and Rosalie were battling head to head too, and from what I could tell, Emmett was winning. Wow, he was really good. I guess that's why he loves this game so much. I saw Edward looking around for Bella, who couldn't be seen. Hmm, that was weird. I couldn't see her anywhere either. Suddenly, I went into "vision mode" and I saw Bella, trapped in a circle of kids, being repeatedly slammed into by a little boy. I looked around for this circle, and spotted a huge mob of kids a little way away.

I drove my car towards Edward, slamming into his and sending him hitting the wall and out of control. I grinned as he tried to get me back, but pathetically, missed. "Hey, Edward! Your girl's being ambushed down there!" I pointed towards the kids. There was no way I was going to try to get her out of there. If there's one thing I'm scared of, it's little kids. They can totally trample you if they gang up on you. I shuddered and drove away to where I saw Jasper cowering from me in his car.

I grinned evilly and sped towards him.

**Edward POV**

Bella? My Bella was being attacked? And by little kids, too? She was so helpless, trapped by all of them. I couldn't even see her. The evil little trouble makers, I had to save her! Besides, I wanted to be the one that TOOK HER DOWN (if she didn't mind). I drove my car towards where Bella was located and started crashing into all the cars around her. The little kids shrieked and hit the walls with their cars, bouncing off in all directions and driving away. As I fought my way through the circle, I spotted my love. Bella's face was angry and she was saying,

"Yeah, you like that, you stupid brat? Well here, take another one!" And she slammed into a little kid that seemed to be causing all the trouble. The kid was relentless, though, and drove into her again with more force, sending her spinning away. I could feel anger inside me. No one hurt my Bella and got away with it.

I sped towards the kid, pushing the pedal down all the way. As I reached closer to him, he spotted me and a look of terror crossed his face. My car collided, hard, with his and he went _soaring._ LITERALLY soaring. His car lifted off the platform, the long metal rod that was connecting the car with the ceiling bent and snapped. He sailed straight over the fence and his car landed on the hard pavement, many feet away from where the platform for the ride was. The kid began to bawl.

"THAT'LL TEACH YOU!" Suddenly, I felt something collide with me from behind and saw that Bella and pushed my car forwards. Why would she do that? I guess this was WAR then.

**Jasper POV**

I had finally managed to ram my car into Alice's, who had been attacking me again and again. She had gone speeding across the platform and crashed into Rosalie's car. They were giggling and hitting each others cars like girls. I rolled my eyes and moved towards Emmett. This was going to be a REAL fight. As I was about to hit Emmett's car, he yelled and made his car do a 360, which hit my car and sent me towards the wall. Haha, time to battle it out. After a good 3 minutes or so of extreme bumper cars, Emmett managed to corner me. This was it. I was done.

"So long, brother. You fought well." He crashed into my car with such force that the car dented and completely fell apart.

I was now sitting on the floor with a seatbelt on, but I had no car. Emmett was roaring with laughter.

"I AM THE KING!" He roared, as the ride began to come to a stop. Suddenly, Bella came spiralling towards us and she sent sparks from the ceiling flying everywhere. A couple of them hit Emmett's head and his hair immediately burst into flames. THAT stopped his laughed. Now I was the one roaring with laugher as Bella shrieked and pulled a water bottle from her bag, dumping it on Emmett's head.

What a loser.


	10. And the Winner is

**A/N: **_Kay, so it's my very first "official" author's note…9 chapters too late. Well, I realized that a lot of people didn't notice that I posted comments on my own reviews so I guess I have to start using my story page to post comments and what not. Anyways, I'm glad you guys liked the last chapter, in my opinion it was better then the one before. Keep on reading and reviewing!_

**When we last left off, Emmett's head was on fire…so now I present:**

**And the Winner is…**

**Bella POV**

"Emmett, I'm so sorry!"

"Whatever, Bella. It's fine, don't worry about it."

I can't believe I had just set fire to Emmett's hair. My klutziness had led to other people getting hurt…that was a new all-time LOW!! Emmett's hair was now singed at the top. Instead of having nice, dark brown hair all around his head, the top was now black. Jasper looked at his "new" hair and smirked.

"Love what you've done with your hair, big brother." Rosalie whipped out her mirror as Emmett felt the tips of his hair. He took the mirror from Rosalie and examined the burnt crisps. 

"You know, this actually isn't that bad. I think I might just keep it this way. Thanks Bella!" I looked down, feeling ashamed. Well it wasn't _really_ my fault that I had gone flying out of control when the bumper cars were stopping. Another stupid kid and come crashing towards me, and I couldn't get the car in control in time. Oh well. At least Emmett liked it…I think.

"So what are we going to do now?" Rosalie asked, taking her mirror back from Emmett and stuffing it in her purse. Edward glanced at his watch.

"We've got 45 minutes left before we have to go. Emmett, Jasper, can I talk to you?" Edward suddenly asked, looking distracted. The three of them walked off, not saying a word to us. I narrowed my eyes suspiciously.

"They're totally up to something," Alice said, raising an eyebrow. Her face suddenly blanked and I knew she was seeing something in the future again. Rosalie and I waited patiently for her face to return back to normal so she could tell us what happened. After a little while, she snapped out of it and looked at us, looking offended.

"They're ditching us! They're not coming back!" I looked around to see the spot where Jasper, Edward and Emmett were standing and found that they weren't there anymore.

"I see they're still determined to win this bet," Rosalie said, shaking her head.

"What's their plan, Alice?" I asked. NO WAY I was going to lose to those guys. I could only imagine the dares that Edward would make me do…_I dare you to marry me! Right now! Ha ha ha ha ha!_ Ugh. No way. Or even worse: Emmett's dare for Rosalie.

_Okay Rose, I dare you to put this on…_

_Umm, that's a loincloth._

_I know._

"They're all splitting up and going on their own rides. That way, they're going to have more by the time this is over!" Alice said, frowning.

"So then we have to do the same thing!" I replied, stomping my foot. "Okay, here's what we do: Alice, you take the west end, I'll take the north and Rosalie takes the south. The part that's left over is the water park, which would be dumb to count as an actual RIDE."

"Hey, I've got an idea. Why don't we tail the guys?" Rosalie suggested. That was brilliant! That way, we'd go on everything they went on. "I'll take Edward, Alice takes Emmett and Bella takes Jasper."

"Great idea!"

"Wait!" Alice said, stopping us from sprinting off. "I have another idea. But…I'll tell you about it later. Meet you guys back at the meeting point at 10!" Alice was gone in the blink of an eye.

"Don't kill yourself, okay Bella?" Rosalie said, before flying off. I turned and ran towards my designated area. Oh great. I had landed myself in the little kids section of the park, but Jasper would undoubtedly be here.

Marrrvelous, I was going to be ganged up on again by little kids. How fun! (Sense the sarcasm?)

**Edward POV**

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I was zooming down a huge rollercoaster. Me and the guys had fled before the girls could've known that we were gone. They were going to lose, and they probably knew it now. Emmett was on his own roller coasters, while Jasper was going on all the "baby rides" that he could possibly endure. As we were going around a loop, a heard a familiar voice behind me.

"Wheeee!" A little squeal behind me told me that Rosalie was on the same ride. Oh crap. I guess Alice had seen our plan and was doing the same now. COPY-CAT! I thought. I twisted my head around to look at Rosalie.

"You know Rose, you're never going to win!"

"Keep telling yourself that, Edward. We'll see when the time comes!" When the ride stopped, I pulled a sheet of paper and a pen out of my pocket and scrawled down the name of the ride I just went on. I saw Rosalie do the same thing. I made sure no one was looking and I began running at vampire speed. I almost tripped when I saw that Rosalie was running right behind me, grinning.

"Why are you following me?!"

"I'm not!" She said, her grin becoming even bigger. Alice, that little midget mouse! She was going to get it.

**Alice POV**

Why, _why_ was I the one that had to follow Emmett? Of _course_ Emmett was the most rash of the group.Of _course _Emmett had to go on the biggest, most dangerous rides. And of course Emmett chose to go BUNGEE JUMPING.

I sighed as I followed him to the rather short line for the bungee jumping. I craned my neck up to see that this was another one of the highest points in the park. And I was going to jump from it because of stupid Emmett. Actually, that might be kind of fun!

I bobbed up to where Emmett stood. "Hey, Emmett," I said, grinning as he looked shocked to find me here. He smiled back at me.

"Alice, good thing you're here. We're supposed to go on this thing in groups of three…we need one more." We looked around and found a teenage girl standing alone. She was eyeing Emmett with "the look". The look all of us got. Ugh. Well if we could get her to bungee jump because of Emmett that was fine with me. I beckoned to her and she looked shocked. She walked over to us and tossed her long, coloured blonde hair while continuing to look at Emmett.

"Hi there, I'm Alice," I said, holding out my hand for her to shake. "This is my brother, Emmett," she looked relieved that he was only my brother. I had to control my eyes from rolling. "We were wondering if you would be able to come onto this ride with us? We need another person to join our little group." I smiled warmly at her. She frowned.

"I'm not a fan of heights," she said, looking anxiously up at the bungee jump. Emmett turned his eyes on her.

"Please?" He said, evidently dazzling her. She nodded as she stared at Emmett in shock. Oh, look, it was our turn to get on the ride!

**Jasper POV**

I had managed to go on 3 of my FAVOURITE rides already, but Bella was tailing me. She followed me everywhere I went and it didn't help that she was whining about it.

"Jasper, can't you go on anything GOOD?!" She asked. While we were on a "Swan ride" which moved at a perfect speed, a small boy had whipped gum at Bella's hair. I managed to get it out without pulling too much of her hair out, but every since that she had been really grumpy.

"No one said you have to follow me around, Bella. I'm accepting you without complaints. You got yourself into this. I'm sorry if you don't like my ride choice." Bella sighed and continued to follow me. A dozen rides later, it was time to head back to the meeting point. We walked together to find Rosalie and Edward waiting for us. Bella sighed again and ran towards Edward, straight into his arms.

"Where are Alice and Emmett?" She questioned, looking around. Just as she said their names, they instantly appeared, laughing.

"Oh man, Emmett, you are a ton of fun!" Alice giggled. "Those rides were awesome!"

"True that, sister!" He said, high-fiving her. Alice ran over to Bella and Rosalie and grabbed their arms.

"Calculate how many rides you've been on, you guys," she said, pulling out a sheet of paper. I got out mine while Edward and Emmett did the same. The girls were huddled together as we counted. After a couple of seconds, we reached our final number. 27. AWESOME!!!!! We scrawled that number onto a sheet of paper and walked over to the girls, who were waiting for us.

"Wait, where's Carlisle and Esme?" Edward asked. I shrugged and Emmett was becoming impatient. I handed our paper to Alice, who looked at her number then looked at ours. Her face showed no emotion.

"And the winners are…"

_Oooh, so I'm leaving you guy in suspense. You have to read the next chapter to find out! I'll update soon! Laterrrz. _


	11. Dares From HELL!

_A/N: Okay, so this is the fourth-last chapter meaning I still have 4 chapters left to write. So don't be upset about it finishing YET! Once it is over though, I plan on writing a new one that involves wizards again…so I hope you guys enjoy magic! Sorry to keep you in suspense…well not really, it's fun leaving you all hanging! But here we go…_

_P.S!! I want to thank Voldemort soooooooooo much for giving me some ideas for a lot of the chapters. YAY VOLDY!_

**Dares From HELL!**

**Rosalie POV**

"And the winner is…" Alice just _had_ to be all over dramatic, didn't she? "And the winner's are…" Another long pause. "And the winner is…"

"GET ON WITH IT, DAMNIT!" Emmett roared at Alice, who giggled.

"Okay, okay I'm sorry. And the winner's are…" Just then, Carlisle and Esme instantly appeared beside out huddled group.

"What's all the hubbub?" Carlisle asked. I turned to him to give him a disgusted look. Ew. He can be so old-fashioned sometimes.

"Are we interrupting something?" Esme asked gently. At this point, if Emmett was human, he would've been turning bright red in anger.

"YES YOU ARE!"

"So, how was your day, kids?" Carlisle asked, acting as if he hadn't heard Emmett.

"It was awesome!" Alice said sounding delighted.

"Anything eventful happen?"

"Umm…well, apart from Bella almost dying, Jasper almost being squashed by falling from hundreds of feet in the air, Jasper also being stalked, Emmett leaving us hanging upside down for ages, Edward screaming for his dear life and meeting two wizards, nothing _really_ happened," I summarized for them.

"That's nice," Esme said. "Would you like to hear about our day?"

"Sure," Bella answered politely.

"We enjoyed the lovely view from a helicopter ride and had a delicious lunch," Esme said, smiling. Now it was Jasper's turn to look at Esme.

"You guys ATE? Without us?!" He sounded appalled.

"Sorry, son, Esme was thirsty!" Carlisle replied.

"OH MY CARLISLE, GET ON WITH THE FREAKING CONTEST!" Emmett bellowed, making us all jump. Edward rubbed his neck, looking impatient.

"Yeah, I'm ready to hear who the winners are myself," he said, slightly annoyed.

"Give the results to Esme and Carlisle, they can tell us who won and no one will be cheating that way!" Bella said. Alice handed Carlisle both sheets of paper.

"If you could just read out the total for both teams, Carlisle, we'd appreciate that," Alice grinned.

"Hmm, sounds simple enough. Okay…the Cullenators are at…27 rides," Carlisle read. A loud cheer erupted from the boys.

"And the Cunning Cullens are at…27!" He announced. Everything instantly went quiet.

Oh my Carlisle. A tie?! What would we do now??

**Bella POV**

"A tie?" Edward said in disbelief. "We never discussed what would happen if there was a tie…"

"A tie-breaker?" I suggested. I was so confused.

"No, that would be too difficult and it's too late for that," Jasper said.

"Well, I guess no one wins then." Emmett looked enraged. He was about to say something when Alice side-stepped him and spoke.

"Actually, I forgot about something," she said, looking extremely smug. She snapped her fingers and instantly, a group of about 8 or so men appeared behind her. They were all human men and extremely good looking, though they looked _so_ average standing beside the Cullens. Just like me.

"What's this?" Rosalie asked, raising an eyebrow.

"This, my dear sister, is my man posse." Quiet. Then finally, Emmett forgot to look angry and broke the silence.

"What the hell is a man posse?"

"This is my own personal group of human-standard ridiculously good looking guys. They're all models and I bought them for when Jasper was busy and I got too bored," Alice said, pouting up at Jasper. He looked disgusted and angry. "Let me introduce you to them!" She danced over and reached for the first gorgeous male's hand.

"This is Hans, he's a German super-model," the man bowed towards us. He had nice cheekbones… "And this is Erik, he's from Sweden." The second male, a tall, blond, muscular one flexed his muscles and posed. What a weirdo. She continued to name off all her little men. The last four were Abercrombie and Fitch models.

"Umm, Alice, this is nice and all, but what does this have to do with anything?" I asked her as Jasper shot the men dirty looks. Rosalie giggled and waved at one of the guys. Emmett grabbed Rosalie's waist and pulled her towards him, but she threw him off.

"Oh yeah, I guess I got kind of caught up. WELL, I ordered my man posse here to go on as many rides as they could for our team!" Alice said brightly. There was another long pause.

"WHAT?" Emmett screamed. "That's not fair! THAT'S CHEATING ALICE!" I was stunned. That was such a good idea…I can't believe I never thought of that! Then again, I could never buy a man posse anyways.

"Actually, Emmett, no one said that's against the rules," Rosalie said, smirking.

"Yeah, but who said that was fair?" Edward shot back.

"YEAH, there was nothing in the rules saying you could hire _man posse's _to do your work," Jasper spat, his eyes narrowing at Rosalie.

"Carlisle, Esme, what do you think?" The two exchanged glances.

"All's fair in amusement park challenges," Esme said thoughtfully.

"Yeah, I say the girls outsmarted you this time, men. They're the clear winners," Carlisle said, shrugging.

Rosalie, Alice and I let out cheers of our own. Alice slapped us both high fives and she danced around, looking more like a little ballerina rather than making a fool of herself. Rosalie stood on her tiptoes and pointed at Emmett in triumph. "IN YOUR FACE!!"

I looked up at Edward and grinned. He looked horrified and avoided eye contact with me. The three of us ran over to the man posse and began jumping up and down in joy with them.

"MAN POSSE'S RULE!"

**Edward POV**

No. No! This couldn't be happening. I was going to have to do whatever Bella wanted to do. I exchanged horrified glances with Jasper and Emmett, who were also looking as scared as I felt.

"Congratulations, girls!" Esme said. "Now, let's go home, shall we?" We all began to walk out of the park, towards the waiting vehicles. Bella caught up with me and Alice and Rosalie joined Jasper and Emmett.

"So, Jasper, here's what _you're_ going to have to do," Alice said, smirking a huge smirk at Jasper. "You're going to have to be Emo for a day," Jasper looked extremely frightened and clamped his mouth shut, as if he was about to vomit.

"And you, Edward, _you_ are going to be Gangster for a day," Bella said to me, reaching up to ruffle his hair. I turned my furious eyes on her and opened my mouth to argue. "No, no arguing, you do as I please! Both of you are going to have to do whatever we want while being Gangster-slash-Emo," she said, wrapping her arms around my waist. I controlled my anger and tried to stop shaking with fury.

"What about me?" Emmett asked, looking nervous.

"Emmett, your task is _special_," Rosalie replied, her eyes shining evilly. "_You, _my darling husband, are going to have to convince the world that you're Harry Potter." Emmett froze.

"WHAT?!"

"You heard me. You are going to be a wizard for one day. In that one day, if you're not able to convince the whole wizarding world that you're the REAL Harry Potter, even though we saw the real Harry Potter today, you're going to get an even HARDER task." Oh man. That was just cruel. I thanked Carlisle I had Bella, and not Rosalie. Emmett looked numb as Rosalie roared with laughter along with Bella and Alice.

"Way to go, Emmett. Good job on giving them ideas for what to dare us to do," Jasper said through gritted teeth.

"By the way, Emmett, remember that little seagull incident? The one where you whipped a seagull at my head in anger?" Rosalie asked. Emmett looked twice as scared as before. "You have another punishment for that. You're going to be a street performer once you're finished your first task, _Harry Potter._ But what will you perform? None other than the songs from _High School Musical 2 _and_ Hannah Montana._"

Whoa. How cruel could Rosalie get? Emmett was about to collapse with the horror of performing songs from those mortifying, talent-less Disney stars.

"Tomorrow, boys," Bella said, grinning.

Tomorrow. The day from hell was going to be tomorrow. Why, Bella, why?

**A/N:**_ I hope you guys enjoyed that! The next few chapters are going to be showing the guys doing their dares. It's gonna be AWESOME! Keep reading and reviewing…P.S. no offence about what I said about HSM 2 and Hannah Montana. That's just the way I, Harry, feel about those actors. Ew. I'll update soon!_

_-Harry_


	12. Dressing Up

**A/N: **_OKAY!! Sorry for insulting HSM 2 and Hannie Montanie to those who were offended but to the rest…EXCELLENT MY MINIONS, EXCELLENT!! Pats for all of those who dislike them too. Evil laughter Anyways, this next chapter is THE BEGINNING OF HELL for the guys, just so that I'll have more to write later on! It kind of involves the dares…the beginning of them anyways. I'm also introducing a new group of characters. Enjoyyy!!_

_P.S. For those of you who are confused about who I am, I refer to myself as Harry. So when I say something like "I, Harry" I mean me. Still don't get it? Go to this accounts profile. _

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own the MAN POSSE! YESSSS!**

**Dressing Up **

**Edward POV**

Here it was. The day straight from hell itself. The day that Jasper, Emmett and I had to humiliate ourselves in front of our family. I still can't believe how we lost that bet. ALICE IS SUCH A CHEATER! I bet she knew she was going to win all along, with her stupid psychic powers and all.

"I HATE YOU ALICE!" Oops. That kind of just slipped out of my mouth. Alice looked over at me in mild surprise. Then she giggled as she looked at my face.

"That's okay Edward, you'll get over it," she said sweetly, as one of the men from her "Man Posse ©" began to massage Alice's feet. That guy is pathetic.

We were all sitting in our living room. I had brought Bella over and we sat on the couch, my arm draped around her shoulders. It was only 6:30 in the morning…and I was hoping to put off the dares as long as I could. I guess I messed up _that_ plan, just now, didn't I?

Alice snapped her fingers and another one of her men came running along. "Augustus, be a dear and show the boys to my room, would you? It's time for them to get "suited up". Jasper froze from where he was standing across the room, staring at the Man Posse © with contempt filled in his eyes.

"What do you mean, suited up?" Jasper asked. Alice rolled her eyes.

"Oh sweetie, use your brain once in a while. You can't be Emo without your Emo clothing and accessories, now can you?" Accessories? I began to shake with fright. One of the men seized my hand, while two others took Emmett and Jaspers'. They began to giggle and speak in a rapid other foreign tongue. Emmett growled in disgust and threw the man's hand off, sending him flying across the room with the strength. He crumpled in the corner of the room and started to cry. A fellow blond Man Posse © member ran up to his fallen comrade and began to comfort him. Alice sighed.

"Co-operate, Emmett! You lost, now don't be a sore loser. Todde," Alice said to another one of her pansy little men. "Please escort Emmett, darling." The man pranced over to Emmett, looking slightly apprehensive but keeping his distance. The other two men had let go of our hands, but now they all giggled again and continued their conversation. Rosalie, who could understand German, listened in and began to laugh.

"What? What are they saying?" Jasper asked, looking thoroughly disgusted.

"They're excited. They get to dress hot men!" Rosalie said, trying to control her fits of laughter. I cringed away in horror. Great. So not only had we lost to a bunch of girls, we had lost to a bunch of pansy MEN too. This day had only begun and it already sucked.

**Bella POV**

I watched in amusement as the boys were dragged away to the dungeons a.k.a. Alice's room. I was awed by the Man Posse ©. They were so useful! I looked around at them, then Alice snapped her fingers again and they all jogged off in a neat little line. "Alice, you never actually _did _introduce us to your Man Posse properly, you know." Alice nodded.

"Yes, well that's about to change." Alice snapped her fingers three times and screamed, "Alte Schutzpoliezeiaufgebot, WIEDER ZUSAMMENSETZEN!!" I looked around at Rosalie in confusion.

"She said assemble, Man Posse."

The Man Posse ran up to Alice once more, in their frilly little line. They had changed into dark wash Abercrombie jeans and very tight see-through white shirts. Rosalie giggled in excitement as a fat little man came running along, holding a fan. He turned the fan on and instantly, the men sprang into their own poses, as their hair blew in the wind from the fan. As the dramatically posed, they began listing off their names.

"Augustus!"

"Erik!"

"Günther!"

"Hans!"

"Jean-Claude!"

"Stephie!"

"Todde!"

"Viktor!"

They all had heavy accents, and I guessed those were the only English words they knew. They wore name-tags, their names spelt out in flimsy handwriting and spelt rather specifically. "Man Posse, this is Bella and Rosalie," Alice said, pointing us out. One by one, they kissed our hands and bowed. I giggled as one of them winked at me.

This day was going to be AWESOME.

**Jasper POV**

I was being dragged into Alice's room where our "costumes" were waiting for us. My heart would've been pounding straight out of my chest by now if I was human. We reached the door and stepped inside apprehensively. Emmett and Edward froze beside me, as we stared at the clothing that lay on the bed.

OH MY CARLISLE. I WAS **NOT** wearing that!!!

**One Hour Later….**

**Rosalie POV**

"Ahem."

I looked up from the magazine I was reading and my jaw dropped in shock. I began laughing uncontrollably as I stared up at the stairs. Was that really Jasper? Oh my Carlisle this is already SO worth Bella almost dying for us to win the bet!!

Jasper stood wearing a black band t-shirt with skinny jeans that had a silver chain hanging onto them. He wore a black hoodie, with the hood pulled over his head to hide his hair and face. His wrists were covered in wrist bands and his head was hanging in shame. Alice ran up the stairs and yanked the hood off Jasper's head. My laughter got even louder. The tips of his honey blond hair had been dyed black and was styled so that it hung over one of his eyes. His eyes had been smothered in black eyeliner and he wore clip on snake bites.

I have to admit, he looked pretty hott but when you remembered that it was Jasper, it was hard to control your laughter.

"Poor, baby, you look great!" Alice squealed. Jasper's nostrils flared in anger. "Where are the others?"

Just then, loud music was blaring from the top of the stairs. I stood up to get a good look and even though my laughter had died, I was now laughing harder than before. Edward stood at the top of the stairs wearing a "pimping" overly-long jersey over his bare, pale skin. His jeans hung at his knees, and his boxers were visible to the world. Under the hat he wore, he had put on a matching green doo rag. He was covered in shining gold and silver chains that hung around his neck. He was carrying a huge ghetto blaster on his shoulder (which is where the music was coming from). He began to swagger down the stairs, moving his head in time to the music, singing "This is Why I'm Hot." When he almost reached the bottom, he tripped over his baggy jeans and nearly fell.

This was HYSTERICAL!!! Once Bella, Alice and I had finished laughing at him, we waited for Emmett. We stood at the foot of the stairs waiting expectantly. Then, when he appeared I smirked. He was wearing a tight muscle shirt over his muscly muscles, with track pants. He hung his head shamefully as he thundered down the stairs. He was holding a CD.

"Ahhh, I see that you've chosen to street perform to Hannah Montana first. Good choice, Emmett," I said, grinning as he growled at me.

"EXCELLENT!" Alice screamed. "Todde, Günther, Jean-Claude, you've all done _wonderfully! _I'll reward you later. Now off you go, Man Posse!!" The men ran off to who knows where and jogged straight through the door.

"Now that you guys are ready, would you like to see the schedule?" Bella asked, looking devious. Edward gulped.

"Schedule for what?" Bella rolled her eyes at Edward.

"You didn't _really_ think that you'd only have to do this dare inside the house, did you? No way! You're going to be going in public, Edward." Edward looked as if he could throw something whereas Jasper sulked and Emmett continued to growl.

"Oh, and Edward, I see you chosen being a part of the Vampz gang. Didn't you want to be apart of the Cripz or Bloodz?"

Edward bit his tongue to stop himself from saying something he'd regret.

**Alice POV**

I pulled the schedule that Bella, Rosalie and I had come up with for the guys out of my pocket. I cleared my throat and began to read.

"Jasper, you and I will be going to a poetry session at the _Life Sucks_ poetry club first. Your new name is now "Life Snatcher". Jasper looked horrified.

"P-poetry?"

"Yes, Life Snatcher, poetry. I hope you have your little Emo poems ready! Edward," I continued, turning to face him. He looked up as he hitched his pants a little higher. "You and Bella are going to find the rest of your gang members. You get to hang out with them today, because the Vampz is a real vampire gang, you know." Edward stood frozen in horror.

"They'll kill Bella!"

"Don't worry, she'll be watching from afar," I said, smiling at him. "We wouldn't want her to get hurt, would we? Oh, and _your_ new name is E-Dizzle." Once the laughter had stopped I continued on. "Last but not least, Emmett, you are going to go to the most popular spot in this town and do your little street performing…for MONEY."

"MONEY?!" Emmett bellowed. "I DON'T NEED MONEY!"

"NO ARGUING!" Rosalie shrieked at him.

"After all of this is done, we're all going to meet in the park, where there's a picnic being held for the whole town. We'll get to see everyone from school there!" I said delightedly. "And from there, I'll tell you what you're going to be doing."

Edward had fallen onto the couch. Poor Edward. Poor Jasper. Poor Emmett.

"Come on guys, after today, maybe everyone will forget what happened."

In your dreams, boys.

**A/N:** _Ew, okay so I thought this chapter was kind of cheesy. But remember, it was a FILLER CHAPTER! In the next chapter, the real fun begins as the guys humiliate themselves. I'll update tomorrow. I PROMISE! And thanks to the person who suggested "This Is Why I'm Hot." You rock!_


	13. SORRY, IMORTANT AN FROM VOLDY

HEY YOU ALL!!!! Kkkk, so this is Voldy talking to you, because Harry is having a small mid-life crisis. She is currently dealing men problems, and is not really in the mood to write. Long story short, she is in like with a man whore, and the fellow slytherins and I are trying are trying to fix this little problem. We are really sorry for this terrible inconvenience, and HOPEFULLY Harry will stop this horrible little bout and move on to continuing her awesomeness of a story. Thank you, Harry's Rep, Voldemort

Ps, sorry to all of you who thought this was a chapter, I am deeply sorry.


	14. Torture!

**A/N: **_UGH!! I'm REALLY sorry about my not-updating lately. As the wonderful Voldy told you all yesterday, I was feeling down in the dumps because of some men problems. ____ Well, I'm over that now. Who needs man whores anyways, right? Thanks a ton, Voldemort, for back-handing me enough times to clear my head. Hopefully it won't happen again. Eek._

_Anyways, BACK TO THE STORY! So I also haven't updated in a while because I had my own personal dreaded day from hell, aka BACK TO SCHOOL DAY. Yes, that's right. I went back to school on September the 4__th__ and since then, I have ALREADY been bogged down with tons of homework. But it's the weekend, so now I have time to right. Get ready for a nice long chapter and thanks for the reviews and co-operation._

_I now present…_

**Torture**

**Bella POV**

I happily dragged Edward out the front door and towards his doom. Today, we were going to hang out with his "homies," aka the real vampire gang called the Vampz. I had never actually seen any of these gang members before but Alice had given me a good idea of what they looked like. E-Dizzle would fit right in.

His ghetto blaster was still pounding out fresh beats (ha ha, I think I'm getting the hang of this gangster talk thing). The loud noise was slightly irritating and it didn't help that Edward only had ONE SONG on the stupid thing. I had been listening to "This is Why I'm Hot" continuously for the past twenty minutes and it was getting on my nerves. "Ugh, Edward, will you turn that stupid thing off? This is precisely why you're NOT right now!" I screamed at him, covering my ears. I could practically say all the words along with the song now.

"Wut's dat, blud?" Edward replied over the loud music. I froze in shock. Did _Edward_ just say that? "You want me to turn down da beatz, innit? Sorry, bredren, but dis how it be if you want me to go along wid all dis gangsta shit, you know wh'm sayin'?" Well. Edward certainly got into character well.

"Umm, okay never mind," I murmured. As Edward made his way towards the driver's seat of his Volvo, I stopped him. "And where do you think you're going?" I asked him, raising an eyebrow.

"I be drivin da car, innit?"

"First of all, you don't even know where we're GOING. Second of all, who said we're taking your Volvo?"

"Ahh, nahh blud, dun tell me we is going in yuh truck?" He asked, looking horrified. I grinned at his expression.

"No, not my truck." A look of relief crossed his beautiful face. "We're going in _that." _I pointed towards the vehicle Rosalie, Alice and I had rented for today. Edward's jaw dropped in complete and utter horror. I tried to stifle a giggle. Edward let out a groan.

We stood facing a faded purple, broken down car. It had flashing blue lights on the dashboard as well as under the car. The top of the car was down and more loud music was pumping from it. I recognized the CD that was playing. It just happened to be the one Rosalie had burned for my use today. I grabbed Edward's hand again and led him towards the car.

"Let's get a closer look at it!"

**Alice POV**

I was driving Life Snatcher towards the poetry club where he would be able to mingle with some fellows. He sat clutching a notepad and pen, his brow furrowed. He was concentrating so hard on the last minute poems he was trying to scrawl out. I let out a small giggle and Jasper glared at me.

"This isn't funny, Alice," he said, giving me a dirty look. "I love you and everything, but this is just pushing it."

"NO LOVING!" I reminded him. "Oh, I forgot to give you one more accessory." I reached into my purse and began digging for what I wanted, one hand on the steering wheel. Jasper looked back down to his poetry, his face even more frustrated than before. Finally, I found what I wanted. I pulled out something small and silver and handed it to him.

"A RAZOR BLADE?!"

"The perfect accessory," I said, flashing him a grin. He looked like he could strangle me. Excellent.

**Rosalie POV**

Emmett and I had reached our destination in record time (no duh). I was now setting up his platform for where he would perform to the oh-so-blah Disney star, Hannah Montana. I laid out a large plastic sheet on which Emmett would be performing and set up his CD player. We were on the corner of Main Street, where EVERYTHING big always happened. It was also the busiest street in Port Angeles. People were staring with curiosity at the little scene that Emmett and I were creating. Well, mostly I was creating it. Emmett was just throwing a silent fit.

He stood against the wall, looking menacingly towards me as he watched me set up. When I was finished I stood up and dusted my hands off.

"Ready, sweetie? I hope you have a dance routine ready," I said, smiling at him sweetly. The look I got in return was frightening. It made me laugh. As Emmett slowly walked towards his plastic sheet, I remembered something. "Oh yeah! Here, Emmett, you'll need this."

Emmett stared at my hands in horror. For in them I was holding a microphone and a blonde wig.

"You can't be Hanna Montana without the proper accessories, can you?"

I pounced onto Emmett's back, desperately trying to wrestle the wig onto him.

"NO WAY! I'M NOT WEARING THAT!" Even more people looked around at us in alarm. We must look kind of funny…

"Emmett, don't make a _scene!"_ I hissed into his ear. "You can do this the hard way or the easy way! Stop struggling _now_, before I disown you!" Emmett instantly went limp and allowed me to perch the wig onto his curls. I adjusted it and Emmett gritted his teeth together.

"Why don't you just let me _borrow_ YOUR hair, Rosalie?" He growled through his teeth. I looked at him in shock. How rude! I handed him the microphone without another word, and he snatched it from my hand and stepped forward. He took a deep breath as I started the music. More curious humans began to gather around.

"Come and see the amazing, singing, dancing street performer!" I bellowed out to the crowd, as they all roared with laughter while staring at Emmett. He looked RIDICULOUS. "Yes, this strapping young lad needs your donations! Please donate money to him, because he's got talent! And now, performing "I've Got Nerve" I introduce, HANNAH MONTANA SENIOR!"

Emmett looked enraged. I was dying with laughter along with the crowd as he put the microphone up to his lips and began to sing.

_We haven't met,  
and that's okay.  
'Cause you will be askin' for me one day.  
Don't wanna wait in line,  
the moment is mine believe me.  
Don't close your eyes,  
'cause it's a chance were takin,  
and i think that I can shake it.  
I know where I stand.  
I know who I am.  
I would never run away when life gets better.  
Everything you see,  
Every part of me,  
gonna get what I deserve.  
I've got nerve.  
Everything you see,  
Every part of me,  
gonna get what I deserve.  
(I've got)  
I've got nerve._

**Meanwhile…**

**Jasper POV**

I gulped as I stared up at a dank looking building. In faded lettering, I could make out "Leo's Pub" which had been replaced with a sign that now read "Life SUCKS! A poetry club." Alice seized my hand and dragged me into the gloomy building. Once I stepped inside, no one looked at me or Alice. The inside was all black, with black tables and red chairs. Large groups of Emo people sat staring up at a stage where an Emo girl stood setting up a microphone. The microphone didn't seem to work. She gave up without really trying, saying "Whatever," and walking away. Alice flounced over to a table and pushed me down into a chair. She then took her own.

"Who's first?" An Emo guy that was dressed like me stood on the stage, looking bored. Alice squealed with excitement and seized my arm.

"HE IS! HE IS!" She shrieked at the guy on stage. Some of the human's heads flickered to where we sat, and they gave us immensely dirty looks. "GO LIFE SNATCHER GO! YOU CAN DO IT, SWEETIE!" She screamed as I walked nervously towards the stage. Everyone was staring at either Alice or me in disgust. Uh-oh, this was NOT going to be pretty.

I climbed up the steps and got to the center of the stage. I cleared my throat and looked around. I gazed over at Alice who was now standing on her chair and cheering for me. I slapped my hand to my forehead.

Alice just _had_ to ruin things for me, didn't she?

**A/N: OKAY! So that's the beginning of the torture. I actually liked this chapter, and I hope you all did, too. Thanks for the person who suggested the little line about Edward being "not." :P And thanks to Voldy, who provided me with some ideas.**

**And I'm REALLY sorry if anyone found ANY of this offensive. But it's a parody, remember?**


	15. Torture: PART TWO!

**A/N: **_When we last left off, Jasper was about to say his little poem, while Emmett was singing along with Hannah Montana and Edward was being driven by Bella to a gang. What's going to happen next? You'll seee…_

_Yes, blackend-fire, we've only begun!! I'll see how long I can make this go. Btw guys, I might not be able to update till next Saturday after this chapter. It all depends on how much bloody homework I have. I HATE SCHOOL!!!!_

**Torture: Part TWO!**

**Jasper POV**

"_My life is a black abyss_

_I am falling_

_Falling_

_Falling_

_The abyss goes on_

_Never ending_

_No one looks as I call for help_

_Falling in this black abyss_

_I call again_

_Yet no one looks up_

_My life is a black abyss_

_And I am drowning in it."_

And then there was silence. Okay, so I knew my poems were last minute, but this one couldn't have been _that_ bad, could it? Then…

"YAY JASPER!! THAT WAS AMAZING, SWEETIE! YOU WERE MEANT TO BE A WRITER! I ALWAYS KNEW YOU HAD IT IN YOU! He's actually brought tears to my eyes," Alice gushed to a group of people sitting beside our table. She couldn't cry, so I don't know what she was talking about. Nevertheless, Alice let out a little dry sob and began to clap loudly again, even though no one else was clapping. I took that as a bad sign, and wandered over to my seat, keeping my head down.

How embarrassing…

**Edward POV**

I didn't know where Bella was going, but she had forced me into the driver's seat of a horrifying purple car that looked as if it belonged to some sort of pimp. She was directing me where to go, so I couldn't even go on my usual speed of 100 miles per hour. Loud music was blaring out of the CD player in the car. "Ridin' Dirty was blasting out of my temporary car, and I was getting stared at (not to mention LAUGHED AT) by all the cars that drove past. I had to deal with it though. Anything for my Bella. I sighed and she turned to look at me.

"Oh cheer up, E-Dizzle," she said as she twined her warm hand into mine. "We're almost there." I looked at her in surprise. Almost there? Right now it looked like we were in the middle of no where! We were in Port Angeles, and oddly enough, it was a part that I had never seen. The walls were smeared with graffiti. I could vaguely make out the words "Cripz and Bloodz" all over the walls, in red and blue. I also saw a lot of green and purple, which was odd. Well, I knew now that the green was for Vampz, but what could purple be?

"Bella, wutz purple?"

"That's the Blood Suckaz gang. You're enemies with them. Okay, careful now Edward," Bella whispered. My eyes widened in surprise.

"Why dat be, woman?!"

"We wouldn't want anyone to get hurt now, would we?" I gulped as Bella pointed towards a small alley way which turned in between two buildings. As we pulled into the street, I began to hear loud thumping noises. Bella motioned for me to stop and told me to park in the alley way. Even with my skills, I could barely get the car to fit. She turned down the music and leaned towards me. "Now, you're going to attach this video camera to your bling, and tape everything that goes on. Alice lent me this portable TV where I can watch what's going on. Obviously, I can't come. Have fun though!!" She kissed me on my cheek and waved her fingers at me.

"EZ, mah laydy."

**Emmett POV**

I was being humiliated beyond belief. After the ridiculous song that Rosalie had chosen for me ("I've got Nerve"…that's just cruel!!), the humans on the street were rolling on the floor with laughter. Literally. All around me people were rolling around, unable to contain their laughter. Rosalie had whipped out a video camera and was taping everything that went on. I wasn't able to contain my snarls, and I was ready to go vampire on all the stupid humans asses, when someone came up to the small hat Rosalie had placed on the ground in front of me. I heard a small _thud_ against the bottom of the hat. I peered inside and let out a roar.

A QUARTER AND AN APPLE?! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?

"NOT ONLY AM I INSULTED BY HAVING TO COLLECT MONEY AT ALL, BUT AN APPLE AND A QUARTER?! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" I bellowed at the small human girl who had so _generously _donated to me. She gazed up at me in clear fright and burst into tears. She ran towards her mother, who was too busy laughing to pay any attention to her pathetic daughter. I felt crappy, I was pissed and I wanted to go home. I felt like Bella when she was PMS-ing. It didn't help that my stupid blonde hair was falling into my eyes.

Rosalie finally managed to contain her laughter, and said to the crowd while gasping from hysteria, "The amazing Hannah Montana Senior will now perform a song from _High School Musical_ _2._ So gather around, one and all, and watch this spectacle GO DOWN!" A new track began to play on the CD player. Oh no. This is the one where I HAD TO DANCE!! AND I had to do this one as a duet!! NOOOO!!!!

"Here to accompany the lovely Hannah Montana Sr. is none other than the FABULOUS ARO!" Rosalie squealed in delight. There was a puff of smoke and Aro appeared out of no where, to tons of applause from the audience. This could NOT be happening!! (**A/N: If you don't get why Emmett's freaking out so much about having Aro as a duet partner, you need to read Two Vampires, A Human and Aro. Basically, Voldy and I made Aro gay in that FF. Hehe…)**

Rosalie handed Aro a microphone and he began to sing:

(Aro) Hey,batter,batter, hey batter,batter swing.

I've go to just do my thing.

(Aro) Hey,batter,batter, hey batter,batter swing.

I'll show you that it's one and the same:

Baseball,dancing,same game.

It's easy:

Step up to the plate,start swingin.

(Not Aro) I wanna play ball now, and that's all.

This is what I do.

It ain't no dance that you can show me. 

Aro seized my hand and twirled me. We waltzed and pirouetted and shimmied across the floor. Could my life get any worse? Just then, I heard a familiar voice.

"Emmett Cullen?!?!?!"

OH SHIT! WHAT WAS MIKE NEWTON DOING HERE?!

**Bella POV**

I sat watching in Edward's shiny old car as he approached towards a swarm of vampires in green clothing. They were all grouped around a ghetto blaster, and all moving their heads in time to the beat. As Edward approached, swaggering as he went closer, one of the vampires looked up. He whipped out a gun.

"Ey, OO YOU?!"

"Chill, bruv, I is a memba o' ur crew, you know wh'm sayin'?" The vampires inspected Edward closely.

"What chu call yoself?"

"E-Dizzle…"

"E-DIZZLE?! IS DAT SUM SORTA SIK JOKE TO MAKE FUN OF OUR GANG, FOO'?!"

"No, no!" Edward said, looking terrified as the vampires began closing in around him. He completely forgot to put on the fake gangster act. "I swear, I wasn't making fun of anything! I'm apart of your crew, apart of the Blood Suckaz!"

OH MY CARLISLE. EDWARD JUST SAID THE WRONG GANG NAME! Shit was definitely going to go down now…

**Alice POV**

For some reason, Jasper was refusing to talk to me. I didn't understand why, because I was the only one who had appreciated his actual poetry. But after he had finished, and I had given him that standing ovation, he had been ganged up on by a bunch of Emo guys and girls and beaten. I wonder why that was? He wasn't hurt of course, but he looked grumpy and surly. Just like an Emo guy should! 

"Hey, uh, Life Snatcher?" A guy was walking past and he stopped at our table. Jasper looked up in surprise. "Your poem was good, man. It was real deep." Ugh. How not Emo of THAT guy. Jasper eyes brightened in happiness.

"You really think so?"

"Yeah. You should go back up there and read some more. After that, we could hang out, you know, have a group wrist-slitting or something."

"He'll pass on that second part," I said hastily to the boy. Now HIS eyes narrowed in disgust when he looked at me. Emo people can be so heartless sometimes! Nonetheless, Jasper went back up to the stage, and began to recite another poem of his. When he finished, the audience just stared at him blankly, as they had done for everyone else. Jasper's eyebrows contracted in anger.

"I WORKED SO HARD ON THAT POEM! I THOUGHT IT WAS A MASTERPEICE! AND ALL YOU PEOPLE CAN DO IS SIT THERE AND STARE AT ME! WHY CAN'T YOU APPRECIATE ME?!" He began to dry sob. How embarrassing! After he was through with his little episode, he looked up and softly said, "Where's the love?"

Suddenly, I felt wave after wave of happiness and love hitting me. I had the urge to reach over to someone and give them a hug. No need though, as a girl from a neighboring table came up to me and gave me a tight hug. The room was suddenly full of hugging people, and soon, two people began to make out. Jasper spotted them and made a face.

"EWWW! TOO MUCH LOVE! Alice, let's get out of here!" He called to me, as the room was filled with love-happy people. I nodded fervently in agreement. I wrenched the girl off me, and ran over to Alice. He seized my hand and pulled me towards the exit.

"That was fun!"

**A/N: Yay, another chapter of torture! Hope you all liked it! Jasper's torture is sort of done, but there's still a little but left to go for Emmett and Edward. Then it'll be time for the town picnic. UH OH!!! Later guys, enjoy!**


	16. Silly Cullens, You've Started a War!

**A/N: **_ALLO ALLO ALL!!! It's Harry here…what did I tell you all about not being able to update until the WEEKEND?! Ughhh, my prediction was correct and I was buried under a pile of homework. So, this well was pretty eventful. I had more men problems (boo) and I ended up making a shrine to someone. WOO HOO!! AND YESTERDAY I SAW A ONE LEGGED SEAGULL WITH VOLDEMORT. LMAO! Okay sorry anyways, the story. So, Emmett just met Mike Newton after his little duet with the FABULOUS Aro, Jasper just made a crowd of Emo people make out and got disgusted by it and Edward. Oh Edward. Shit's gonna go down with my Edward 3 Here we go…_

_P.S. I'd like to thank Voldy ONCE AGAIN cause she came up with Jasper's poem in the last chapter. She's all Emo-y whereas I'm a prep. _

**Silly Cullens, You've Started a War!**

**Edward POV**

OH SHIT!!! What had I just DONE?! I was now being chased after by a group of sadistic gang-member vampires for claiming I was part of the wrong gang, and now they were TOTALLY going to kill Bella, and me, but more important, BELLA! I ran straight towards the direction of where the car was parked. Maybe, if I could reach the car fast enough, the vampires wouldn't be able to catch up with us when we drove away.

YES! EXCELLENT PLAN, MAH BROTHA!

**Bella POV**

WHAT WAS EDWARD DOING?! WAS HE _TRYING_ TO GET ME KILLED?! I was watching my little TV screen in horror as Edward was being chased by, what, eighteen, nineteen, vampires? And he was running straight towards me. I looked up to see Edward running (AT HUMAN PACE TOO!!!) right at the car, and I screamed for him to stop.

"EDWARD! EDWARD NO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING EDWARD? YOU'RE GOING TO GET US BOTH KILLED!! AND FOR CARLISE'S SAKE YOU'RE A VAMPIRE, DAMNIT. RUN LIKE THE WIND, YOU RETARD!!!" Edward's eyes widened as he saw me standing in the car and it finally clicked that maybe it _wasn't_ the best idea to lead a bunch of GANG VAMPIRES with not only GUNS WITH BULLETS that could fly right through me, but also with razor sharp teeth that could rip through me like ripping through tissue.

Thankfully for me, the Vampz isn't exactly the smartest of gangs. They were running equally as average and slow and humanly as Edward, and they were too dumb to realize they can run a thousand times faster. Edward finally reached the car and hurtled himself into the car. "EDWARD! What are you DOING?!" I roared at him. "CAN YOU OR CAN YOU NOT OUTRUN A CAR?!" Edward's mouth made a perfect little "o" of realization, and he sprang out of the car, seizing me by the waist with him. As soon as he flung me on his back, the Vampz had caught up with us

We were surrounded.

**Rosalie POV**

Oh my Carlisle. Could this day honestly get any better? Not only had Emmett just danced and sung to the stupidest song EVER along with the marvelous Aro, but now Mike Newton had spotted Emmett and was gaping at him. Emmett would have flushed with anger at this point if he was human, but instead he stood rooted to the spot, clutching Aro's waist and staring at Mike in surprise. Mike was staring back equally as confounded at the bizarre scene Emmett was causing. I was roaring with laughter and I spotted something in Mike's hand that made me laugh even more.

"Is that really you Emmett? I thought you went off to University…" Mike's voice trailed off as he squinted at Emmett. Emmett gritted his teeth together and I interrupted.

"Oh hello, Mike. Emmett and I are back for our holidays." Mike hadn't noticed me and he flushed when he realized I was talking to him.

"What are you doing here, Mike?" Emmett asked, still clutching Aro. Aro let out a little giggle as Emmett's hands tightened around his waist out of anger. Emmett looked down in surprise and let out a cry of disgust, releasing Aro so he fell to the floor.

"HOW RUDE, EMMETT CULLEN!" Aro pouted. He picked himself up, reached into his Coach bag and pulled out a lint and dirt remover. He then vanished in another puff of purple smoke, waving to the applauding crowd.

"Oh, I'm here to pick up some stuff for the picnic. My mom needed me to pick all this up," Mike said, gesturing to his full hands. I spotted a box of tampons and giggled. Mama's boy! "I heard some music coming from over here, and wanted to see what was up with all the ruckus, so I came over and, well, found you here Emmett. Umm…" Mike now looked nervously down and cleared his throat.

"You look really nice with long, blond hair Emmett." I let out a shriek of laughter. I CAN'T BELIVE MIKE JUST SAID THAT! Emmett's eyes bugged out and I suddenly had another idea.

"Say, Mike, did you watch _High School Musical 2_?" I asked him. Mike's eyes lit up.

"Oh yeah! I totally loved that movie!" He began to sing "You Are the Music In Me." I could barely contain my laughter.

"Mike Newton, how would you like to accompany Emmett in singing "You Are The Music In Me?"

**Jasper POV**

Alice and I were back in her bright yellow Porsche 911 Turbo. Alice had burnt a CD for us to listen to. It was full of loud, scream-o/emo music and I kind of liked it. I sat there, my hood pulled over my head and my hands in the pockets of my hoodie. Today actually wasn't THAT bad! I turned to Alice.

"You know, Alice, that was kind of nice. I mean, I really like Emo people! They don't have much emotion so I'm not constantly bombarded with their feelings…and they're so nice! No one throws themselves at me!" I exploded at her with happiness. Alice grinned. I guess my happiness was contagious.

"I'm glad you liked it Jasper but the point was that you DIDN'T like it," Alice said, her grin turning to a frown. "Now I need to think of something else to do." I froze in horror. Okay, sure I may have liked that. But I didn't want to do anything MORE! "Let's go to the park so I can think. Besides, we still have a lot of time before the town picnic. Alice parked her Porsche on the side of the road and dragged me into the empty park. She sank down onto an empty swing and pushed me down onto the one beside her. She swung her hot little legs back and forth, a look of deep concentration etched onto her face.

Suddenly, I was thrown forwards off my swing and I landed in the sand. I scrambled off the floor and looked around when I heard, "I DROP-KICKED AN EMO!!!!" I glared at two kids running of away from the park. I made movements to go after them but Alice held me back, laughing. Then, another group of what looked like Emo's and a group of people covered in all black with heavy white makeup smeared all over their faces appeared. They were shoving each other, and shouting loudly. Alice stood up to get a better look at what was going on and squealed in delight, clapping her hands together.

"Look, Life-Snatcher! It's an Emo-Goth MOUTH OFF!!!!" She grabbed my hand and dragged me towards the arguing groups. I gulped as I realized what she was doing.

I was going to have to participate in her so called "Emo-Goth mouth off."

**Edward POV**

"'Sup G'z?" I asked, my voice breaking in terror for Bella. I didn't care if I died. But I would never let them heart Bella. I could hear their thoughts and I snarled in disgust. NO WAY IN FREAKING HELL I WOULD EVER LET THEM GANG RAPE BELLA AND THEN DRINK HER BLOOD! NO WAY IN HELL DAMNIT! I gripped onto Bella stronger, and she did the same.

"Ey, how bout dis yo? We'z a let ya go, bredren, in exchange fa someting. Give us da gyal, 'nd ya ga free, innit?" One of the vampires said illiterately, licking his lips while looking at Bella. I snarled at the vampire again.

"So dis how it'ta be?" Another one asked, his crimson eyes narrowing. Suddenly Bella's lips were at my ear.

"Edward. Edward, I know how to distract them so we can get a head start before they hunt us down. Put me down."

"_No way, Bella!_" I hissed at her.

"_Just do it Edward, we won't get hurt!" _Very, very reluctantly I put her down and she sidled towards the car discretely. Twenty pairs of eyes followed her. "Eyy, G'z. Check dis out, you know wh'm sayin'?" Bella said expertly, and she leaned towards the car and pushed a big, green button.

Suddenly, the car began to bounce up and down. Hydraulics! GENIUS BELLA! All of the Gangster Vampires stared at the cars like they were a delectable human girl. They edged closer and began to move their heads up and down in time to the movements of the hydraulics in the car. Bella silently moved to my sides and I carefully slipped her onto my back.

"Siiiiikkkkk!" One of the vampires said, stroking the car and moving his head along with the others.

Then I slowly began to walk away with Bella on my back. One of the vampires snapped out of his trance by the time we were across the street.

"EY DEY BE RUNNIN'!!!"

SHIT! I ran full out now, Bella squeezing her eyes shut. There was nineteen blood thirsty vampires on our tail.

**A/N: Okay, there's yet another chapter of torture. I'm bringing it closer to the town picnic now though, so there's going to be like the ending of the torture and then….WOOH MORE TORTURE AT THE PICNIC! I shall post again TOMORROW Poppits! Toodle-loo! Hope you liked this, and thanks for the reviews!**

**P.S. For the person who asked about the "Oh My Carlisle" thing, it's like this: Carlisle created the other Cullens, right? Just like God creates others? Oh. My. God. Oh My. Carlisle!**


	17. Heartache and Gun Shots

**A/N:** _UGHHH, you guys should be thankful I'm even posting this week. Cause I'm __sooooo__ NOT feeling writing today. All I did today was type on this stupid laptop about science and edit other peoples written CRAP. ARGH!!! So if it totally sucks, I blame you guys. WHY MUST YOU BE SO DEMANDING?!_

_HERE:_

**Heartache and Gun Shots**

**Mike Newton POV**

_Na __na__na__na__Na __na__na__na__ yeah__You are the music in me__You know the words Once Upon A Time__Make you listen. __There's a reason.__When you dream there's a chance you'll find__A little laughter or a happy ever after__Your harmony to the melody__It's echoing inside my head__A single voice__Above the noise__And like a common thread__Oooh__, you're pulling me__When I hear my favorite song__I know that we belong__Oh, you are the music in me__Yeah it's living in all of us__And it's brought us here because__Because you are the music in me__Na __na__na__na__ oh__Na __na__na__na__na__Yeah __yeah__yeah__ (Na __na__na__na__You are the music in me__It's like I knew you before we met (Before we met)__Can't explain it (__Ohh__ohh__There's no name for it (No name)__I'm saying words I never said__And it was easy (So easy)__Because you see the real me (I see)__As I am__You understand__And that's more than I've ever known__[You Are The Music In Me lyrics on hear your voice (Hear your voice)__Above the noise (__Ohh__ohh__I know, I'm not alone__Oh you're singing to me (__Ohh__ yeah)__When I hear my favorite song__I know that we belong (Yeah __ohh__You are the music in me__It's living in all of us__And it's brought us here because__You are the music in me__Together we're __gonna__ sing (Yeah)__We got the power to sing what we feel (What we feel)__Connected and real__Can't keep it all inside (__Ohh__Na __na__na__na__Ohh__ yeah)__Na __na__na__na__na__Ohh__ yeah)__Yeah __yeah__yeah__ (Na __na__na__na__You are the music in me (In me)__Na __na__na__na__Ohh__ yeah)__Na __na__na__na__na__Ohh__ yeah)__Na __na__na__na__You are the music in me__When I hear my favorite song (Favorite song)__I know that we belong (We belong)__You are the music in me__Yeah it's living in all of us__It's brought us here because (Here because)__You are the music in me_

My heart was pounding. My palms were sweating. My breath was coming in fast gasps. Could this really be happening?

Was I really singing with EMMETT CULLEN, the man of my dreams? I looked into his eyes as I sang along with all the words. What a lovely shade of molten gold...I was Gabriella, he was my Troy. He really IS the music in me. I've never sang better in all my life. The effect he has on me is breathtaking. He looked back at me with his golden eyes, his mouth twisting into an obvious face of disgust. But that doesn't matter. Now was my chance. The adrenaline in my blood stream was pumping my heart even faster, as I made the bold and daring move.

Slowly, I reached out to caress his soft, perfect angels face. My hand slipped because of my stupid, STUPID nerves and I ended up with my hands in his beautiful blonde wig locks. He didn't seem to notice. I then slid my hand down lower and lower, until I finally reached his face. I brushed it with my fingertips. He instantly froze. It was working!! I grabbed his hand instantly, finishing off the song with a final, confident:

_Na __na__na__na__Ohh__ yeah)__Na __na__na__na__Ohh__ yeah)__Na __na__na__na__You are the music in me (Yeah)_

There was silence all around us. No applause? WHY? WHAT DID I DO WRONG?! My angel was staring at me in horror, his ice cold hand frozen in mine. I took this opportunity to interlock my fingers in between his and he let out a roar of rage.

Suddenly, my feet were lifted off the ground. WHAT WAS GOING ON?!

**Jasper POV**

"IT'S SO MUCH BETTER! LOOK AT THE DETAIL AND THE INTRACACY OF IT, DAMNIT! DON'T MAKE ME GET OUT MY RAZOR BLADE!!"

I stood silently listening to the argument that was brewing in front of me. I didn't even know what they were talking about! But I stood, nodding vigorously in agreement with what looked like the Emo's. Then, a weird-looking girl in all black with creepy albino skin screamed, "OH MY SATAN, THEY ARE TOTALLY NOT BETTER!! Have you not SEEN the beauty and the depth of ours? Have you not heard the MASTERPEICES that are entwined in ours?" All of the creepy Goth's roared in agreement.

"WHATEVER, WHORE-PREP, OURS MATCH OUR BLEEDING SOULS!"

"WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME, YOU [profanity. YOUR STUPID SOULS AREN'T EVEN BLEEDING! OURS HAVE BEEN APPROVED BY SATAN HIMSELF!" The Goth girl shrieked back. There was a gasp as the Emo's stood stock-still, gazing in what looked like horror and shock.

"Life Snatcher has something to say!" Alice suddenly piped up, staring at the group innocently and breaking the silence. They all whipped around to look at us, the new arrivals, and gave us intensely dirty looks. My eyes widened in horror.

"Ummm..where's the love?" I desperately tried sending out love waves again, hoping that it would have the same effect as it did in the poetry club. The waves were pathetically weak, and the Emo's eyes glazed over as they turned to each other to give out half-hearted hugs. The Goth's, however, stood unchanged, glaring at me.

"Love is for HIPPIES! HIPPIES SUCK! GET OUT OF HERE, YOU DAMNED HIPPIE!!" The Goth Girl was screaming at me. Why was she so MEAN and HEARTLESS?!

"Hey...I agree!" I said in surprise. I totally did! I mean true, I loved Alice, but that was different. The Goth girl looked at me in interest.

"So what's your name anyways?" She continues as the Emo's still pathetically hugged.

"Jasper. And you?"

"My name's Courtney. Why are you hanging out with these losers anyways?" AHHH, another COURTNEY?! WHAT THE HELL?

"I...don't know," I replied, glaring at Alice, who was glaring at Courtney. "What are you guys arguing about anyways?"

"Whose iPod's are better. And I think we all know now, that Goth iPod's kick [profanity!" She whipped out her iPod and showed it to me. It was black and covered in chains and skulls. It was so awesome!

"Whoa, these things are Gothically AWESOME!!" I yelled out. I turned to Alice. "I don't WANT to be an Emo anymore. I'M GOTH NOW[profanity!!!" Alice rolled her eyes at me. Courtney grinned.

"You're pretty Gothically awesome yourself," she said. YAY!! GOTH AFFECTION! She reached into her pocket and pulled out a mutilated, mumified object of some sort. There were faded blood stains on the bandaging. "Here. It's my lucky llama paw. I got it off the llama myself."

"Okay, Jasper, sweetie, I think it's time for us to go now," Alice said through gritted teeth, seizing my arm in her vice-like grip and dragging me away. I took the paw from Courtney and grinned at her.

"CALL ME! ASK SATAN FOR MY NUMBER!!" Courtney cried out as we walked away. As Alice shoved me into the car, I turned to stare out the window at my new friends. I suddenly saw the Emo's whip out their razor blades in unison, and throw them at their wrists.

"DRIVE ALICE, DRIVE!!!"

**Edward POV**

"GO FASTER EDWARD!! GO FASTER!" The Vampz were catching up with us, and Bella was screaming in terror. They were hot on our tail, and I couldn't let them get to Bella. My stupid pants kept falling down to my knees, and I struggled to hitch them up while trying not to throw Bella off my back. My bling suddenly whacked Bella in the face and she let out a cry of pain.

"ARE YOU OKAY?!"

"WHATEVER, JUST KEEP RUNNING!!" We sprinted through the streets, gunfire sounding around us. It wouldn't harm me, but Bella COULDN'T get hit! My pants suddenly slipped clear down to my ankles, and I nearly tripped. I was definitely slowed down. I roared in frustration and tore the pants from my ankles, tossing them behind me. They hit Bella in the face.

Oh my Carlisle. It was a great day to choose to wear my special pink Calvin Klein BRIEFS that Bella had bought me! I was now running around, half gangster, half underwear model with a girl with pants on her head on my back. Pretty bizarre...

We turned into an alleyway. I hoped that it would take us back to the picnic, where we could hide Bella. Then, I felt Bella's heart stop for a second. I saw what were evidently more vampires around the corner, wearing purple. I streaked past them and they saw the colours I was wearing and pointed with faces contoured into rage.

"EY, _EY_, DAT'S A VAMP, INNIT?!"

"INNIT!! INNIT!" The other Blood Suckaz yelled out. As we managed to distance ourselves from the Vampz, the Blood Suckaz began to run after us as well.

COULD THIS GET ANY WORSE? "UGHH, I HATE STUPID GANG MEMBER VAMPIRES!!!" Bella screamed out into my ear.

Apparently, it could.

**Rosalie POV**

We were driving along to the town picnic. The silence between Emmett and I was an embarrassed one, that's for sure. Emmett and seized Mike Newton and thrown him against a wall, where he crumpled into a heap, screaming, "MY ANGEL! MY ANGEL! WHY WOULD HE DO THIS TO ME?! MY LOVE!" I looked at Emmett out of the corner of my eye.

"Even you, Emmett, didn't deserve that. About that whole Mike thing, I'm really...uh...s-so.." Emmett interrupted.

"I don't ever want to talk about it again. Just keep driving...does this mean I won't have to do the Harry Potter thing anymore?" I grimaced.

"Sorry, Harry. You still are." Emmett looked intensely angry. Suddenly, we spotted Bella and Edward being chased by a HUGE group of people. They were heading straight towards the picnic.

What was going on?

**A/N: Hmm, writing that actually made me ****feel**** better. ****Haha****, sorry for insulting you guys.**** But if it IS crappy, you guys brought it upon yourselves. **


	18. Alice, How Could You?

**A/N: **_I don't __want__ to write again today. The prospect makes me CRINGEEE but since you guys actually like this stupid thing, then I shall continue for you all. I hate school. I hate homework. I'm bogged down with it as usual and my adorable stupid science teacher gave us three projects at once, and little instruction for them all. I HATE YOU HOMEWORK!!!!!! __Hahah__, is it weird that I'm in love with a teacher? And made a shrine to him? And he could possibly know? __Anyways, ON WITH THE STORY._

**Alice, How Could You?**

**Alice POV**

As Jasper and I drove along, I could swear I was hearing elevator music in the back of my head. Japer sat there, writing poetry, because he ACTUALLY wanted to be Goth now. I rolled my eyes as his brow furrowed in concentration and he crumpled up another sheet of paper and tossed it to the floor. The elevator music was getting louder. Was I going insane or something? Louder...louder...UGH this is so frustrating!! I can't take this anymore. I reached over to the radio and was about to fiddle around with it, when I realized something was already playing.

"Jasper, what the HELL is this?" I said, ripping his CD out of the CD player and tossing it out the window.

"ALICE HOW COULD YOU?!" Jasper threw his note pad down in rage. "How in the name of Satan do you expect me to concentrate now?! I was so close to writing the perfect poem for-" but he suddenly stopped what he was saying and looked down sheepishly. I looked over at his note pad suspiciously and grabbed it off the floor, one hand on the wheel.

"TO MY DEAREST FRIEND COURTNEY? Jasper?? What is this? You've only known that girl for, what, five minutes max?"

Jasper seized his note pad from my hand defensively. "She's my new friend! She said we could write poetry together and I wanted to start writing some in advance...I'm sorry Alice," Jasper said, pouting and giving me the puppy dog eyes. I sighed. "Besides," Jasper continued. "You owe me a new CD now! I mean...elevator music is the epitome of concentration!" I rolled my eyes and we drove on in silence.

I suddenly stomped my foot down on the break, coming to a screeching halt. Jasper looked up in alarm. I felt my jaw drop open as I looked at the commotion in front of me. Running at a ridiculously slow pace with no bottoms on except for exceedingly tight briefs (GAG!!) was Edward. A flustered Bella was thrown onto his back and she was screaming out instructions to Edward from what I could tell. Along with them, Rosalie and Emmett were sprinting along. They were being pursued by a _huge_ group of gang members...OH CRAP! I knew that clothing! It was none others than the Vampz and the Blood Suckaz. But together? What was this all about? I averted my eyes in horror as memories began to flood back.

"Alice, we have to help Edward, Bella, Emmett and Rose!" Jasper tried to get out of the car but I reached over him to slam his door shut.

"NO!" I shrieked, looking up at him and trying to conceal my guilty face. It wasn't working because Jasper's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "We...we can't, okay?"

"WHAT?! WHY NOT?!" **(Harry here...uh oh, what's Alice up to?)**

**Emmett POV**

Rose and I had joined Edward and Bella. We had no clue what was going on, but we had received some garbled form of the situation from Bella while we sprinted alongside her and Edward. Something about Edward...and stupid...and a gang war? Who knows what was going on, but it clearly wasn't good. We were sprinting past a familiar car now. I squinted over at it and I saw Alice sitting ridigly in the drivers seat, Jasper screaming something at her while she paid no attention to him. I waved my arms to catch their attention (**Yeah, Emmett, because they clearly don't notice the giant mob of people running past) **and Alice turned away. I could feel my anger building up as we were being chased by a group of vampires that outnumbered our own, yet Alice and Jasper do nothing about it. If I survive this, I'm going to have to have a "talk" with those two...

Alice's car drove away, and we were left to fend for ourselves. "THE PICNIC! EDWARD, HEAD TOWARDS THE PICNIC!" I screeched to Edward. He followed my instructions and ran towards the park, where a fairly large group was converged. Loud voices and laughter floated towards us.

"EMMETT ARE YOU INSANE? YOU'RE LEADING A GROUP OF SADISTIC VAMPIRES TOWARDS A GATHERING OF HUMANS! Why must you be such a retard?!" Rosalie wailed at me.

Oops...I guess I _was_ leading blood-thirsty vampires into a group of humans, wasn't I? Oh well! As long as we got away safe.

**Bella POV**

Everyone was staring at us in horror. Gun shots were going off in all directions now. There was screaming and chaos all around us, and stupid, dumb Emmett was about to get everyone killed now! The town's women were in their fancy Church dresses while the boys were dressed casually. But who cares what they were wearing, they were flying in all directions, screaming in horror.

"HEAD FOR THE HILLS! WOMEN AND CHILDREN FIRST!" Shrieked Jessica Stanley, running past us in the opposite direction.

"THIS ISN'T A FLOOD, YOU MORON!" Lauren screamed back.

"GANG WAR! GANG WAR!! Emmett!! My angel Emmett, stop running, I can protect you! I don't want you to get killed! Please!" Mike Newton dropped down onto his knees, his arms crossed in front of Emmett. Emmett tripped over him in horror and Mike squealed as Emmett fell on top of him. What the hell? All I could see now were Mike's hands all over Emmett, as Emmett bellowed in rage and tried to get Mike off of him. Ewww, I don't even want to know. Everywhere we looked there was havoc. The gun shots were still being fired and I could hear distant chants of, "Innit! Innit! Innit!"

Then suddenly, a strong, powerful voice spoke above all the screaming and yelling.

"STOP." Everyone froze in place. Where was that voice coming from?

**Edward POV**

Some sort of all powerful, soothing voice had caused us all to freeze. I stood rooted to the spot and all the gang member vampires and my family had done the same. A look of dawn crossed my face. I knew who that voice could be.

"God?" I whispered up at the sky.

"GOD? What are you talking about, Edward? It's me, Alice!" Tiny Alice emerged, holding a megaphone to her lips. There were ripples of laughter around me and I looked down in shame. Suddenly, as the gang vampires spotted Alice, they all dropped to their knees in unison. "Innit...innit...innit!" They chanted; it was different this time. More relaxed, awed and they all began to kiss the floor Alice was walking on. Alice looked flustered. Jasper was trailing behind her, looking immensely confused.

"Why are they all bowing to you, Alice?" He asked suspiciously. Alice looked over at him, embarrassed yet determined.

"Jasper sweetie, this is something I've never told you but...I'm the Head Chav. Jasper looked as confused as I felt. I looked around. No one seemed to know what she was talking about but then Bella let out a gasp of awe.

"She's the Queen of all Vampire Gangs!" She whispered, so that only Emmett, Rosalie, Alice and the gang vampires and I could here. "She's the head of all vampire gangs around the world!" We all stared at Alice in horror, shock and surprise. Alice lowered her head, looking ashamed, but then she looked up with determination in her eyes.

"Stop all this nonsense! All of you!" She commanded to the vampires on the ground in front of her. "I know how to settle this, once and for all." She gulped and looked around at everyone.

"We're going to have...a DISNEY CHANNEL DANCE OFF! The winner's get the other group at their mercy."

I stiffened. I didn't hear that right, did I? A Disney channel DANCE OFF?! NO FLIPPING WAY.

**A/N: ****Hmm, hope you liked it. I shall hopefully post more tomorrow. Till then, **

**Harry. **


	19. Planning the Dance

**A/N:** _GAHHHH THIS WEEK SUCKED! Okay, so this week was a train-wreck. Everything just HAD to go wrong. But, I did make a LITTLE bit of progress with the TEACHER I LOVE. Bahaha. Okay anyways, this might be the last chapter. I write as ideas come to me, so we'll see when this chapter is over. Oh, and I'd ONCE AGAIN like to thank Voldemort for any ideas she may have given me, and I'd like to thank my friend Colton who probably is going to help me with this chapter. _

_Oh, about Emmett proving he's Harry Potter, I doubt I'm putting this in here. I'll probably turn it into a whole different Fan Fiction, if you guys want. If you guys don't want to read about that, I won't put it up. So enjoy the possibly last chapter…!_

_P.S. Remember, a Chav is a gangster. _

**Planning the Dance**

**Rosalie POV**

What? WHAT?? Alice was the Queen of "Chavs"? That is so FREAKING RANDOM. I whipped my head around to glare at her.

"Alice, why didn't you tell me this before? You promised that we'd always share all our secrets! And I've always wanted to be a queen!" I accused her, tossing my hair over my shoulder and pouting. Alice looked down guiltily.

"I'm really sorry, Rose, but once you're the Queen of Chavs, you can never tell anyone about it." I glared at her some more.

"Umm, Alice, you're the only Queen there ever was…you're the one that came up with that rule, so you could totally break it," Bella said, raising her eyebrows. My eyes narrowed even more at Alice, who turned to stare at Bella, looking hurt.

"Thanks for sticking up for me! I'm totally going to take you _revenge shopping_ for this one," Alice added with a hiss. Bella looked mortified. As she opened her mouth to reply, Edward stepped in between what was going to turn into a very heated argument.

"Hey, cool your jets, ladies," he said smoothly, flashing his topaz eyes at all of us. I rolled my eyes. I have the same coloured eyes; as if his little tactics would work. They definitely worked on Bella, who melted on the spot. I tried to contain myself from snapping at her.

"Can we NOT worry about shopping and girly betrayal right now? We have a crisis on our hands! There's no way in hell that I am going to participate in any sort of _Disney Channel Dance Off_!" Emmett bellowed. I walked over to his side and threw my arms around his waist.

"I agree! I mean, Emmett's torture was because he and the other boys lost the bet. Why should I have to do any of this?" I glared at Alice again. Her and her stupid ideas!

"I don't dance," Bella said, her eyes widening in fear. She paled as she imagined herself twirling amongst all of us Cullens, who would surely make her look like a down-right fool.

Suddenly, the gang vampires all began to growl. Emmett and Jasper tensed next to me, ready to attack if it was needed. Well, I'd rather fight than DANCE to settle who was going to have the others at their mercy.

**Bella POV**

I can't dance!! I really can't, and I was appalled that Alice would even suggest such a thing! I could feel the tears coming to my eyes out of anger. How embarrassing. But then again, I didn't want all the Cullens risking their lives for me, _again. _I was such a hazard to them! Why couldn't they hurry up and change me, or just dump me all alone in some sewage grate somewhere? Suddenly, Jasper whipped out a razor blade and looked shocked about it.

"Bella, stop it! Your self-hatred thing is affecting my Goth status!" Jasper wailed, trying to shove the razor out of sight before anyone saw. The "chavs" began to howl in anger, I think. I couldn't really tell.

"No! No!" Alice scolded. "Bad chavs! Down! You WILL do the dance off, or I will make you live with the Emo's, innit?" The chavs began to cower and bowed to Alice once more. She turned slowly to face us. "Okay, my minions are being co-operative. So you will do this damn dance off if it's the last thing you do!" She bared her teeth at us, and I could see the vampire in her coming out. It was truly frightening. My knees began to shake and I felt myself fall to the floor.

"Bella! Bella!" Edward wailed. "Look what you've done, Alice!"

"It's not Alice's fault she over-reacts to everything," Rosalie murmured. Edward glared at her. Jasper sighed and shakily said,

"Fine. We'll do it." Alice clapped her hands in delight.

"Great! You have 10 minutes to prepare. ONLY 10 minutes, so use your time wisely." The Cullens began to cluster around me, so we could plan this mortifying dance. I may have had graceful, elegant vampires on my side, but we were totally going down.

**Jasper POV**

We had to do this dance right. We HAD to win. Wait…who's judging anyways? Edward seemed to have heard my thoughts and asked Alice.

"I am of course!" She beamed. "Well, along with Carlisle and Esme, of course." She scooped into the townspeople crowd and seemed to pull Carlisle and Esme out of thin air. They beamed at us.

"Good luck, everyone," Esme said, smiling at us all.

"You better win, kids, otherwise you'll be converted to gang vampires and probably end up getting Bella killed. NO PRESSURE!" Carlisle said sincerely. I gaped at him. No pressure? Whatever, Carlisle…

"So what are we doing?" Emmett grumbled, staring around at the circle we had formed. I was grinning. "What? Do you have any suggestions?"

"As a matter of fact, I do," I said smugly. I pulled out a bag. "This is my special kit. It has everything I could possibly need for emergency Disney Dance Off's!" Edward stared at me in disgust.

"Yeah, because we have those all the time, don't we Jasper?"

"Yup!" I nodded in agreement. "So anyways, look at what I have!" I began to pull out all of my favourite Disney DVD's and all my different iPod's (colour co-ordinated of course) that had only the soundtracks of each DVD on them. My family stared at the collection.

"Jasper…you're a retard."

**Edward POV**

Alice came over to us. She looked down at the DVD's in Jasper's clutches. "Jasper, what is this?" Alice asked looking frightened.

"Now you know why I don't like people going into my office," Jasper replied, with a twitch of his eye. "I have signed MILEY CYRUS and HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL posters on my walls. They're all framed and everything!" Jasper beamed with pleasure. "You know how I said I was going hunting for a week? Well…I actually went to the Best of Both World's concert!"

"But that doesn't make sense!" Bella said, looking thoroughly confused. "Your eyes were topaz when you came back!" Jasper grinned.

"Well, I might have had a snack or two with Miley Cyrus…you know those puppies that she loves so much? Well…" Bella looked disgusted.

"Jasper, how could you?! Puppies are so innocent! Why couldn't you have eaten her instead?" Bella shot at him. He shrugged and turned back to his DVD's.

"So we have Mary Poppins, Mulan and Beauty and the Beast," he continued. I say we choose two songs from Mary Poppins, and one from the rest."

"Okay, I'm really weirded out right now, so I'm going to go check on my chav's," Alice said, backing away slowly. Suddenly, there was a flash of pink smoke, and the air was littered with sparkles. Harps began to play. I knew who that was…I had to have it right this time.

"God?" I whispered again.

"Oh, well I guess you could call me that," a bubbly, sugar-coated (almost sickly so) voice called out. OH CRAP, IT COULDN'T BE!

"ARO!!!" Aro squealed in delight. Rosalie let out a shriek and ran over to greet him. They held each other and began jumping up and down in acknowledgement. "Hey bay-bay!"

What was Aro doing here?!

**Chav #56 POV**

"Ey, da Queen be comin'! Innnitt," we all chanted, nodding as we checked out our queen.

"Hello Chavs, how are you doing?" The hot small pimpin' girl asked.

"Innit," we all replied, drooling. "We gotz our songz all chosed up, innit? Is dey ready? Dem otha folkz?" I asked with courage.

"Mmm, I hope so. I really want to get this show on the road."

"Well, we iz ready weneva. We loves ya, Queen!" My fellows nodded in agreement.

**Aro POV**

I was totally going to help out with this dance competition. After all, I was Queen of Dance Dance Revolution. Rosalie had her arm clutched around her waist. "Aro totally has to help us! He'll make our dance INCREDIBLE; those chav's won't stand a chance! By the way, where's Coco?" **(A/N: If you don't know who Coco is, go read Two Vampires, a Human and Aro! He's Aro's pet iguana.) **I glared at Bella.

"Oh, remember last time's little incident? Well, Coco told me he didn't want to come if SHE was going to be here again," I pointed at Bella accusingly. "We were sitting up late, watching music videos when Coco told me how much he hated that Bella. He could've died because of her! I mean, she ruined his tan!" I pouted in remembrance of that sad, tragic accident. Bella looked like crying. Hoo-ray!

"Stop it, Aro," Edward growled at me. Oooh, I love it when he gets worked up like this! I giggled.

"Oh Edward, I love it when you talk rough with me. Rawrr," I purred at him, stroked his chin with my perfectly manicured nail. He pulled away and growled in protest. I let out another shrill giggle. "So what are our song choices, dear ones?" Jasper roughly shoved his little collection at me.

"Oh Jasper, this is so attractive," I said, looking up at him. "Disney movies? That's so delicious," I giggled again. Jasper looked horrified. Oh Jasper. How I would just love to have him to myself late at night…with no one around…and Coco keeping watch over the doors…I would totally tear that clothing off his skin and shove him down onto my queen sized bed (for a queen!) where I could – **(A/N: Okayy, time to censor Aro's thoughts before they get a little R rated!) **

"OH I KNOW WHAT SONGS WE CAN DO!" I shrieked. "Okay, we're totally doing, Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, Chim-Chim-Cher-ee, Reflection and Be Our Guest! Now, time to choreograph this all!"

And so we got to work.

**A/N: LMAO I'm thoroughly satisfied with this chapter. So it won't be the last. There'll be one more, and that's the actual DANCE OFF! I totally know what I'm doing for it, so there'll be a new chapter up in less than 24 hours. Later, all. **


	20. DanceOff!

**A/N: **_My sincerest apologies to all the readers of this fanfic! I got REALLY lazy and haven't updated in weeks and I'm SOOO sorry for that. But in between homework, extra-curriculars, and worshipping a teacher, I didn't have time to write the last chapter. BUT now I'm immensely bored and being my nerdy self, I've finished all my homework so it's time for the DANCE-OFF!!! YAY!!!! _

_And I still don't know whether you guys want me to write a whole "Emmett must prove he's Harry Potter" thing. Thanks to the one person who actually wants me to write it…! Okay, enjoy the last chapter of "Cullens plus Amusement Park equals DISASTER!"_

**Plot Summary: Last we left off, the Chavs and the Cullens (and Bella) were at WAR! Since Alice is the Queen of Chavs, she decided that this brawl would be settled through a DISNEY CHANNEL DANCE OFF! Aro unexpectedly turned out to help the Cullens out…so who's going to end up winning and having the other team at their mercy? Keep reading to find out…**

**Dance-Off!**

**Alice POV**

I am so nervous right now…on one hand, I want my family to win this dance-off so that they aren't viciously torn apart by gangster-wannabes. On the other hand…I'm the Queen of Chavs! I can't watch my lowly minions fall at the hands of my family! That would totally destroy the point of my reign, and I'd have to find another whole group of stupid Chavs to rule over…DAMNIT! Why did I have to suggest this?!

I paced back and forth and threw anxious glances at both teams. I caught Jasper's eye and he smiled at me. I sighed. This whole thing would NOT be easy…

"You know, dearest, if you keep crinkling up your forehead like that, you'll get worry lines!" I knew that bright, cheery voice. I whipped around and let out a squeal of delight.

"ARO!! What are you doing here?" Aro leaned in to air-kiss me. He took my hands and looked me up and down.

"Oh sweetie, you look ravishing! Well, I wanted to go shopping but Marcus and Caius refused…as usual," Aro said, pouting. "I asked Jane if she wanted to go and she was more than delighted to come with me but then Felix came along and took her away for some sort of 'important business' with her. As if we didn't all already know what was going on between them!" Aro rolled his eyes and looked disapproving. "Oh those naughty creatures I was so bored, so I decided to visit my FAVOURITE GAL-PALS!" Aro crooned.

How I loved Aro. He was always so optimistic and up-beat about everything! "So are you going to be a judge with me, Carlisle and Esme as well?" I asked him. Aro shook his head.

"Of course not, Alice, dear. You really think the fools in your family could choreograph their own dance? No offence intended. But they _really _did need my help. Especially that _Bella_," Aro scoffed and sneered her name. "They're practicing now as we speak. I'm so excited!" Aro jumped up and down and clapped his hands in anticipation. "OH, I can hardly bear the suspense. That reminds me!" Aro said, as he clapped a hand to his mouth. "I invited all the other Volturi to watch as well!"

Bella had heard Aro and had completely blanched. She looked on the verge of passing out. "Aro, how could you?! Oh I forgot, you don't like Bella…" I shot Aro a stern look and ran over to where Bella had collapsed onto the floor. She looked up at me as she approached, and Edward looked livid.

"The…the…V-Volturi…are coming?" She looked at me in horror. Edward snarled.

"DAMNIT ARO, I HATE YOU! YOU'RE GOING TO GET HER KILLED!" Aro joined the group and giggled at Edward.

"Oh, Eddy, now is not the place to get all worked up. Save it for the bedroom," he gushed. Edward's eyes completely bugged out. "Don't worry; they're only coming here to watch, and I forbade them to do anything work-related here." Everyone looked a bit more relieved. "Now let's get to work sweeties! On your feet, whore," Aro snapped at Bella. "And a-one, and two, and three and…

I left the group to go check on my Chavs. I looked down at my watch. One more minute, and it was time for the dance.

"ONE MINUTE!" I screeched at them all. Everyone jumped and began to practice last-minute furiously.

"And…time's up! Who's first?"

**Emmett POV**

There was a flash of gray and the air was filled with the sound of swishing cloaks. The Volturi had arrived. Their new way of getting around was so…inconspicuous.

"We are NOT going first!" Rosalie hissed.

"Oh come on, Rose dearest. Get it over with!"

"NO!" We all roared at him in unison. Our team and the Chavs all converged in the middle around Alice and Carlisle. Esme was seating the "guests".

"Let's flip a coin to see who goes first, then," Carlisle said reasonably.

"We could really use you just about now, Alice," Jasper muttered. Alice shook her head in disapproval.

"Heads!" Bella shrieked out.

"INNIT!!!" The Chavs cried. I shot them a dirty look. If Bella hadn't gone first, how the hell were we supposed to know what they said? Carlisle flipped the coin and Bella held her breath.

"Tails…meaning the Chavs go first!" Carlisle exclaimed. I let out a cheer and slapped Bella a high-five, who grinned. We all trooped back to our seats to watch the stupid Chavs dance. Dance little gangster-wannabes, dance!!

The music began to play. Jasper let out a gasp of comprehension. "They're starting with 'Under the Sea' from the Little Mermaid!"

**Esme POV**

I watched the big, tall, vampire-gangsters dance. Under the Sea? That's one of my favourites! I waited for Sebastian to start singing…a Chav stepped forward to represent Sebastian.

"Innit innit innit innit innit!" He crooned. WHAT??? What's that mean? I looked around at Alice and Carlisle in alarm. Carlisle looked shocked.

"DISQUALIFIED!" He screamed. Alice's jaw dropped in shock. "Those aren't real lyrics!"

"No, no!" Alice stepped in as the Chavs began to growl. "They didn't know! I'll tell them they have to use lyrics! CHAVS! INNIT, INNIT LYRICS, INNIT?" She screamed at them. They nodded in understanding. "Start your second song!"

New music began. I didn't recognize it until…

"_Oh da wonderful ting 'bout Tiggers, are Tiggers iz wonderful tings!"_ A Chav sang. There was a huge roar of laughter coming from my family. I looked at the Chavs, horrified at their song choice. They other Chavs began to crip-walk back and forth. They snaked, wiggle-walked, V-walked and did various other moves to the song.

"Wow. They really know how to corrupt an innocent Disney song, don't they?"

**Rosalie POV**

I couldn't contain my laughter. That was RIDICULOUS! Crip-walking to THE WONDERFUL THING ABOUT TIGGERS?! What is wrong with those idiots? This competition was already ours. As my family and I tried to get a hold of ourselves, the next song started to play. A brave Chav stepped forward, holding a gun. That stopped Bella's laughter right there.

"HEY, HEY, NO WEAPONS!" Carlisle roared.

"Deyz part of our dance, tho, man! We need 'em az propzz, innit?" He said. Carlisle's eyes narrowed in suspicion.

"Alright fine." Carlisle said, clearly still suspicious. The Chav began to sing.

"Let's get down ta, business. To defeat da Cullenz!"

"HUAH!"

"Did dey send me daughters? When I asked for sonzz..

You'z da saddest bunch I've eva met.

Buhh you can bet,

Before we're throo.

Mr. I'll make a Chavv outta you!!"

The Chavs began to send gun fire everywhere. Everyone began to scream in shock, but the bullets didn't hit anyone. Edward shielded Bella with his arms. UGH, this was one of my favourite Disney songs of all time and the Chavs had to totally butcher it! Jasper shook his head in disgust. "This is pathetic. BOOO!!"

Not soon enough, the Chavs were finished and began their last song. As Jasper listened to it, he squealed in delight.

"WE'RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER! Yes!" He pumped his fist into the air. But once again, the Chavs (who lacked creativity) did nothing but sing it horribly and dance the CRAP-walk again. Aro raised a perfectly plucked eyebrow with skepticism.

"Those poor Chavs could really use a fabulous choreographer, comme MOI! Be thankful you dears had me," he said, brushing off his shoulder. Edward rolled his eyes. The Chavs finished, and there was an awkward silence. Alice stood and clapped with joy.

"OH, WELL DONE MY MINIONS!!" Everyone half-heartedly joined in her applause, and soon, we found ourselves up next.

"Alright kids, you're up!"

**Edward POV**

I was putting way too much faith into Aro's dancing skills right now. He had taught us a fancy and intricate dance routine and we all had it down pact…except Bella. I was worried about her…but she couldn't any worse than those retarded Chavs. Jasper hooked his iPod into the CD player and we all got into our places. I squeezed Bella's hand and assured her everything would be fine before running to my spot. Aro stepped forward.

"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!" He sand at the top of his frilly lungs. We began to line dance in time to the music. We stomped and turned and twisted and I watched as Bella made a fool of herself. Note to self: Must teach Bella how to dance. She fell over a few times but everyone was too mesmerized by Aro's dulcet tones and the rest of our amazing line dancing skills. When we finished, Aro bowed and blew kisses into the crowd. Jasper quickly ran to the CD player to change his iPod.

It was my turn to sing. For this song, Aro had picked some sort of graceful vampire-ballet he had invented. He had called it "Vallet"…

"Chim-chimeree, chim-chimeree, chim-chim-cheroo!" I began nervously. I had to control my voice and stop it from cracking. My family "valleted" around me. I could feel Aro's cloak swishing around my knees. I rushed through the song, occasionally throwing someone off. As Jasper danced around me, he sent waves of calm over me so that I wouldn't spoil the whole thing. It worked, and my voice sounded as sweet as velvet, if I do say so myself. When we finished, I sighed with relief. Everyone was clapping around us again. Aro passed by me and pecked me on the cheek, giggling madly. Bella looked enraged.

Rosalie was next to sing. She was perfect for this song. Aro's choice of dance for this next song was very…confusing. It was the song "Reflection" from Mulan and instead of the nice, slow version it was an up-beat, remix. Aro had suggested we all dirty dance for this one. So as Rosalie sang her lungs out, I found Bella grinding against me (why was she so good at this?!) and Aro was sandwiched in between Emmett and Jasper who looked highly uncomfortable.

By the end of it, everyone was roaring with laughter, but surprisingly, they were all amazed at what good dirty-dancers we were. YES!! IT'S THE LAST SONG!! This was the one where Aro had to sing, so we wouldn't all be sexually harassed by him…

**Bella POV**

Finally. The last song. Aro stepped forward, warming up his throat with a "Do-re-mi-fa-so-la-ti-do!" In eight different octaves. WHAT A FREAK! Aro had taught us another dance he _claimed_ he had invented. Rosalie had said it was true.

As Aro crooned to "Be Our Guest", swooping over the real guests and flourishing, we waltzed around on the grass. I was with Edward, Rosalie with Emmett and Jasper was twirling in the center on his own. Yeah…Aro had invented WALTZING. How bizarre. Edward had graciously placed my feet on his, and he was leading so I had nothing to do but compose myself gracefully. The Cullens did amazingly, and at last it was over. That was the best one yet! When we finished, there was silence.

Suddenly, the Chavs exploded into green and purple smoke. I let out a shriek of shock and Alice looked horrified.

"You…you guys were so amazing that they…they EXPLODED!" Alice said in shock, running over to where her Chavs had formerly been standing.

"I guess this means we know who won…" Esme said, looking as shocked as everyone else. Alice began to wail.

"MY CHAVS, MY BEAUTIFUL CHAVS!!" I let out a laugh of delight and happiness and relief, and Emmett roared in celebration. We all celebrated, and Rosalie ran over to Aro and hugged him tightly. She was shortly joined by Emmett, Edward, Jasper and I (Aro was thrilled of course. His hand slid past Edward's back and Edward looked terrified, but was locked in his grip). When it was my turn to hug Aro, I shied up to him and said,

"Thank you so much Aro! We couldn't have done this without you!" I tried to hug him but he shot me a dirty look.

"Ew. Don't touch me!" I backed away, offended. Aro returned to his bubbly self seconds later.

"Who's the queen?" He squealed.

"ARO IS!" The Cullens roared. Suddenly, there was a bright flash of blinding light. I looked around in alarm.

Standing before us were Miley Cyrus, Zac Efron, Vanessa Hudgens, and the rest of the random High School Musical crew.

"We heard there was a Disney Channel Dance-off and we just HAD to see it!" Miley Cyrus screamed out. Ewww, she was in her Hannah Montana outfit.

"Are we too late? Is it still-" Ashley Tisdale began, but her words were drowned out with a scream. Jasper was jumping up and down in joy and screaming like a high-pitched girl.

"OH MY CARLISLE, OH MY CARLISLE, I LOVE YOU ALL!!" He began to sprint towards the Disney stars, who looked alarmed but before he could reach them, the Volturi had beat him there.

There were wild roars and mass-movements around me as everyone attacked the Disney stars…to EAT! I couldn't watch. I covered my face in Edward's chest as the vampires around me attacked.

"GAHHH, I HATE DISNEY CHANNEL STARS!" Caius roared, heading straight for Lucas Grabeel.

"YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE!" Jane screamed, attacking Vanessa Hudgens. "YOU'RE GOING DOWN, WHORE!"

"STOP, STOP! YOU CAN'T KILL THEM!" Carlisle protested. Marcus stopped mid-pounce on Zac Efron.

"You're right…so…DISNEY CHANNEL STAR FIGHT!" And they all seized the stars and began hurling them at each other, laughing insanely.

The Cullens converged around me and we all laughed nervously.

"What a two days this has been…" Alice said, shaking her head. "I'm glad it's over!"

"Yes, but tomorrow, my Emmett's going to have to prove he's Harry Potter, isn't he?" Rosalie grinned, stroking Emmett's chest. He looked miserable.

"I love all you CULLENS!" Aro sang, as he sidled up beside Carlisle and began fondling his face. Carlisle shifted away slowly.

"Let's head home, shall we?"

**THE END!!!**

**A/N: So I hope you guys enjoyed my fan-fic and the last huge chapter of it! LET ME KNOW ABOUT THE EMMETT THING! I'll start a new project VERY soon! Thanks for all your reviews and reading, dedicated fans! ARO AND I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!**

**Love, Harry**


	21. Author's Note: HARRY'S REBIRTH!

Hey guys! Guess whooooo? (Yeah, after like, two years too...) It's HARRY! Yeah, so I OBVIOUSLY haven't updated in ages and I'm probably making you guys hopeful that I'm writing another story...well, the truth is, I'M NOT [AT THE MOMENT. SO I've been dying with homework all thanks to school, which I discovered I'm in love with (YES I'M A LOSER...AND PROUD!). I've been piled with projects and stuff that I've had to take care of, not to mention I made it onto the volleyball team! Wooh!! But now, volleyball's over and I'm up-to-par with the majority of my homework. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS?! TIME FOR ME TO GET WRITING AGAIN! YAYYYYY! (Well, in about two weeks actually...MARCH BREAK starts then, meaning a week of meaningless nothingness which STORY TIME.) Alright, so as for my new story, I want to know what you guys want to read. Here are your options: Emmett Potter and the Scar Scam (Lame title, yes, but I'm in a Media Arts class right now and its almost time to go. I need some sort of title for now, but that's totally not the real one). This one is where Emmett tries to prove to the world that HE is the REAL Harry Potter even though the actual Harry Potter is out there. It's a continuation of my last story, "The Cullens Plus Amusement Park Equals DISASTER!" Cedward Meets Kelly. Yes, that is an idea for another one of my story. So I'm sure you've all heard about the DISASTER that was ROBERT PATTINSON being cast as Edward (OKAY SERIOUSLY, WTF?! THE CASTING PEOPLE ARE BLIND!! I COULD CAST BETTER PEOPLE! And honestly, I COULD BE A BETTER EDWARD CULLEN THAN CEDWARD! I'm tall enough! ) So yeah, I Christened him CEDWARD cause Cedric Diggory Edward Cedward©. Yeah, that's copyrighted. I take pride in my retarded mind. ANYWHO, this story is for anyone who's seen any of the Liam Kyle Sullivan videos (Shoes, Let Me Borrow That Top, Text Message Breakup, etc...) I was plotting with Voldemort before and it would actually turn out quite amusing.

Edward, Ned and Fred – Bah, this one's totally insane. I've just had this idea before of Edward having two twin brothers, making them triplets. That's all I'll disclose for now.

SO HIT ME UP WITH REVIEWS GUYS! LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU WANT, AND I SHALL PROVIDE! (P.S. Voldemort and I WILL continue the Gay Aro story sooner or later. Promise!)

Tons of AFFECTION cough, HARRY!


	22. Author's Note: Harry's REAL Rebirth

Do-Re-Mi-Fa-So-L'AUTHOR'S NOTE

**Do-Re-Mi-Fa-So-L'AUTHOR'S NOTE!**

Guess who's back, back, back, back again? HARRY IS! Okay, so before I go anywhere with this Author's Note let me say… –Smashes head into wall repeatedly- And no doubt I deserved that too! I realized I probably instilled some false hope in you guys with my last AN saying that I'd be back and writing but … that totally didn't happen! I am utterly and whole-heartedly SORRY for that! But hey, IB hard times that are totally life ruining.

BUT NOW VOLDEMORT AND I HAVE SUMMER HOLIDAYS, and I know I, at least, have plans to get back and writing again. I was talking to her just now and we're taking a trip to Wonderland tomorrow (the Amusement Park featured in my story). So that could mean a whole new story with the Cullens heading off to "Adventure Land"! Anyway, I have a LOT of ideas as to what new stories I could write. Of course, over-the-top comedy and parodies are my thing, and I've read the comments about some people finding my stuff "crazy", but hey dude, that's kind of the point!

SOOOO here are some of the potential stories you guys could be seeing in the next few months:

The Cullens plus Amusement Park equals DISASTER! (PART 2)

Emmett's quest to prove he's the real Harry Potter. (I have promised you guys that one…)

THE SOUND OF MUSIC REMIX where the Cullens are now the VON TRAPP CHILDREN!

The Cullens go to NARNIA! Oh man, those are two things I love sooo much RIGHT THERE. I think I might do that one first…:O

But yeah, I'm gathering the ideas in my head, storing them and then once I have something going for me, I will be writing at the speed of light! Like that Narnia one … I actually might have a good start on that one. And besides, I love Narnia with a PASSION, I've already seen the Prince Caspian movie in theatres 4 times. (Isn't Ben Barnes just the most AMAZINGLY HOT thing EVER?! Drool pool)

So since its holiday time and I have nothing better to do, REST ASSURED, I will be writing! SEE YOU GUYS SOON!


	23. Emmett Potter is up!

Author's Note: Guess what guys

_**Author's Note:**__ Guess what guys? THE STORY ABOUT EMMETT'S HARRY POTTER DARE IS UP! I won't say anything more, except I hope you like it! And leave comments. It angers Voldemort when her email inbox is flooded. It's called "Emmett Potter and the DimWitted Wizard Twits." _


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